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Updated: May 23, 2025
The fact was, that about this time the community, like Balaam's ass, began to grow more enlightened than its rider, and to show a disposition for what is called "self-government."
Fulkerson was still morally crawling round on his hands and knees, as he said, in abject gratitude at Beaton's feet, though he had his qualms, his questions; and he declared that Beaton was the most inspired ass since Balaam's. "We're all asses, of course," he admitted, in semi-apology to March; "but we're no such asses as Beaton."
Going a little in front, he "stood in a path of the vineyards, a wall being on this side, and a wall on that" Neddy caught sight of the angel again, and being unable this time to bolt into the field, he lurched against the wall, and gave Balaam's foot a good scrunching. Still the prophet suspected nothing out of the common, for that was an ordinary trick of refractory asses.
She said, "What have I done unto thee, that thou has smitten me these three times?" The first words of the ass were so chosen as to call Balaam's attention to the wickedness and uselessness of his undertaking against Israel; "Three times" was to remind him that he wished to curse a nation that "three times" in every year arranged pilgrimages to the Lord.
He said instead, "God said to me, 'Go not with these men, for that would be beneath thy dignity, but await nobler ambassadors." Balaam's plan was to insult Balak, so that he should send no further messengers to him, and no one might discover that he could accomplish nothing beyond the word of God. His expectations, however, were disappointed.
Pliny and Virgil and the Druids and Balaam's Ass are invoked as foretelling Her birth; the Old Testament that venerable sufferer, as Huxley called it is twisted into dire convulsions for the same purpose; much evidence is also drawn from Hebrew observances and from the Church Fathers.
T' be sure, this prophecy don't come down t' dots quite as much as I'd like it to; but I s'pose that that's th' way with 'em always eh, Professor? Th' prophets sort o' leave things at loose ends on purpose; so's they can run 'wild' on a clear track, without any bother about schedule time or connections." "Well, our burro lays over Balaam's," Rayburn struck in.
For all I care, you are Robert Burns, or Napoleon Buonaparte, or anything, from the Mother of the Gracchi to Balaam's Ass. But I knew you first as Mr. Ducie; and you may take it that I'm Mr. Don't-see." He reached up a hand towards the valve-string. "What are you proposing to do?" "To descend." "What? back to the enclosure?"
Might I give Monseigneur a word of advice?" "Let us listen to the words of wisdom which God Almighty sometimes puts into the mouths of children," said the bishop, smiling. "Well, you know he made Balaam's ass speak out," said the young abbe quickly. "But according to some commentators she did not know what she was saying," replied the bishop, laughing. The two grand vicars smiled.
The ass, by the way, is a lineal descendant of Balaam's animal. They proceed, and the asses nod and bow as though they knew how to pray. Enan weeps as they near a town. "Here," says he, "my dear friend died, a man of wisdom and judgment. I will tell thee a little of his cleverness." A man once came to him crying in distress.
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