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Updated: June 15, 2025
And all of them raised "Whee ee!" Some of them were heard saying "He doesn't know much." Don't take a teacher for an encyclopaedia! If I could work out such hard questions as these easily, I would not be in such a backwoods town for forty yen a month. I returned to the teachers' room. "How was it this time?" asked Porcupine. I said "Umh."
Umh, plaistered and bound up? bloody? how comes this? goe too and goe to; if I have done any mischiefe or bene over valiant in my drinke to kill a man or soe, why 'twas in my drinke, not I, and let my drinke be hangd for't; or, I say and I sayt, let um stay till I am drunke againe and then hange me; I care not, I shall not be sensible of it. Blesse me whose this? ha ! Enter Grimes disguised.
Umh, where is this fidle? in the ayre? I can perceave nothing. Where is my kinde friend and my fine companion? come, we will be friends again; goe to, we will.
Ever, ever, whilst you live, Jarvice; the dauncers alwayes payes the musike. Wilt breake custome? No, or there a pawne for you. Mr. Steward. Mus. This is your bountifull Captaine! a rope of his bounsing! But stay, lets play to the steward; it may be when he wakes we may worke him to't. Omnes. Lov. Umh , play a healthe: soe; say, it shall goe rounde: goe to, I say and I sayt, it shall goe round.
The name of the musician, I suppose; but the reading of the MS. is somewhat illegible. The passage at first ran as follows: "Umh, how long have I slept, or am I buried and walke in Elizium as the poets faine? Goe to, where are they? in the ayre? I can percieve nothing nor remember anything has been don or said!" 'Grimes. Soe, now retire a little.
Oh, hees fast enough; heele be ready to cast up his accounts the easier when my lady calls him. Crac. Come, come; who payes the Musicke? Captain, you have my purse. Suc. Truths a truth from Infidell or Pagan: I am in trust, and that's beleife, and so it shalbe saved. Pay the Musick? umh, where are they? let me see, how many's of you, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6: good, can any of you daunce? Mus. Daunce?
Grimes. How does your worshipp? Mr. Steward, dee feele your selfe at ease? I am hartely sorry for your misfortune? Lov. Misfortune? ha, what misfortune? now heaven and't be thy will Grimes. Pray heaven they be alive. Lov. Ha, alive? in the name of drinke what have I don? where did you find me, ha? Grimes. Why, sir, comming out umh, umh Lov. Out with't, man. Grimes. Out of a bad-house, sir. Lov.
Dat's how I tries ter live up ter my name wid a white cornscience, bless de Lord! An' I looks fur my people ter he'p me all dey kin." And now, amid a hearty chorus of "Amens!" and "Glorys!" he raised his hands for a benediction, which in its all-embracing scope did not fail to invoke Divine favor upon "our good 'Piscopalpalian brother, Riviren' Chesterfiel' Jones Gord bless him." Umh!
Any instructions in the duties and ethics of doorkeeping? "'Umh no. "'Have you ever attended lectures on doorkeeping? "'No, sir. "Have you read any text-book on the subject? "'No. "'Have you conversed with any one who has read such a book? "'No, sir. I'm afraid not, sir.
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