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"Do you know, my dear Major," we hears her announce about nine-fifteen, as she toys with a three-dollar portion of roast pheasant, "I had no idea New York could be like this. Then there are the theaters, the opera. I believe I shall stay up for the rest of the season." "Good!" says the Major. "I shall stay too."
That is the kind of contract that can be let on Science and Health every year. I am obliged to doubt that the three-dollar Science and Health costs Mrs. Eddy above fifteen cents, or that the six dollar copy costs her above eighty cents. I feel quite sure that the average profit to her on these books, above cost of manufacture, is all of seven hundred per cent.
I lay reading and smoking awhile; then, when I could hold my eyes open no longer and was about to put out the light, the great clock began to boom, and I counted ten. I reached for the Waterbury to see how it was getting along. It was marking 9.30. It seemed rather poor speed for a three-dollar watch, but I supposed that the climate was affecting it.
The second impulse was to arise in his might, put on a stout pair of the Terwilliger three-dollar brogans the strongest shoe made, having been especially devised for the British Infantry in the Soudan and garments suitable to the occasion, namely, a mackintosh and pair of broadcloth trousers, and go to the rescue of the distressed domestic.
The vag let his head fall so that his eyes rested upon the ground. Patsy fished something from his vest and holding it out to the man, said: "Here's a one-dollar bill and a three-dollar meal ticket which will you have?" "Gi' me the pie-card." "Which shows you're not a regular bum," said Patsy. "No," said the man, eyeing the meal ticket with its twenty-one unpunched holes.
The looms of to-day would be the looms of four hundred years ago. The passive ownership of machines does nothing to improve their construction. If a gang of ignorant thieves could steal all the watches in America, and then let them out to the public at so much a month or year, this would not convert the three-dollar watches into chronometers.
The health-officer's tug ranged alongside for a moment, our purser handed the lawful three-dollar permit fee to the health-officer's bootblack, who passed us a folded paper in a forked stick, and away we went. The entire "inspection" did not occupy thirteen seconds. The health-officer's place is worth a hundred thousand dollars a year to him.
Louis for a three-dollar, bank of Springfield, which being yet current, at a discount of four cents to the dollar, enabled the fortunate owner to take his last tumbler of port-wine sangaree before his departure for Texas.
"Oh, do I? Why do I need a new stenographer, Mr. Bones?" "Well, it would be a good investment, and I know a corker." "Who is she?" "Miss Day, of the Monon." "I didn't know you cared for Miss Day." "I don't. That's the reason I want her to work for you." Murphy coughed slightly, then he agreed. "You're learning the game. We'll give her a three-dollar raise, and take her on."
Everywhere I came in contact with the discontented. I saw only those whose lives seemed about to end in failure, and my grim notions of farm life were in no wise softened by these experiences. How far away all this seems in these days of three-dollar wheat and twenty-six cent cotton these days of automobiles, tractor plows, and silos!
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