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"And he's at it ag'in this evenin', up there in his room," the doctor informed them. "I went up to give him my lamp, and I'm swanged if he ain't got a many books and such pamp'lets in his room! As many as ten, I guess! I tole him: I says, 'It does, now, beat all the way you take to them books and pamp'lets and things!" "It's a pity of him!" said motherly Mrs. Wackernagel.
Them's fur Cat'lics and 'Piscopals and fur warriors and the Mennonites don't favor war! Unyforms yet!" he laughed. "I'm swanged if that don't tickle me!" "I stand corrected. I beg pardon if I've offended," Fairchilds said hastily. "Miss Matilda I hope I've not hurt your feelings? Believe me, I did not mean to."
And if ever you need a doctor, just you call on me, and I'm swanged if I charge you a cent!" Among the simple population of New Canaan the Doc was considered the most blasphemous man in America, but there seemed to be a sort of general impression in the village that his profanity was, in some way, an eccentricity of genius.
Now they reason this here way a person that never has dirty hands is lazy and too tony." "Yes?" "But me, I don't mind. And I'm swanged if I wouldn't like to beat out Jake and Nathaniel on this here deal! Say! I'll tell you what. This here game's got fun in it fur me! I believe I got a way of DOIN' them fellers. I ain't tellin' you what it is!" he said, with a chuckle.
But I'm swanged if Adam didn't just up and say, when the preacher got through, he says, 'That wasn't a square deal accordin' to MY way of lookin' at things. Yes, that's the way that there feller talked.
But I'm swanged if I could keep in! I just HOLLERED!" The doctor threw back his head and shouted with fresh appreciation of his story, and Fairchilds joined in sympathetically. "Well, did he die unconverted?" he asked the doctor. "You bet! Reverend he sayed afterwards, that in all his practice of his sacred calling he never had knew such a carnal death-bed.
"But it's a way that's goin' to WORK! I'm swanged if it ain't! You'll see oncet! You just let this here thing to me and you won't be chased off your job! I'm doin' it fur the sake of the fun I'll get out of seein' Jake Getz surprised! Mebbe that old Dutchman won't be wonderful spited!" "I shall be very much indebted to you, doctor, if you can help me, as it suits me to stay here for the present."
"You see, them swanged fools in the legislature has went to work and passed a act ag'in' my protest, mind you compellin' doctors to fill out blanks answerin' to a lot of darn-fool questions 'bout one thing and 'nother, like this here." He had spread open on the table the paper he had drawn from his pocket.
The doctor, who was loath to have her leave, who held her interests at heart, and who knew what she would forfeit in losing the help which the teacher was giving her daily in her studies, undertook to add his expostulations to that of the brethern and sisters. "By gum, Tillie, slick them swanged curls BACK, if they don't suit the taste of the meeting!
Be sure, I don't give babies, and so forth, doses like them. All such I treat, still, according to home-o-pathy, and not like that swanged fool, Doc Hess, which only last week he give a baby a dose fitten only fur a field-hand and HE went to college! Oh, yes! and heerd lekshures too! Natural consequence, the baby up't and died fur 'em. But growed folks they need allopathy."
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