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Over the long anguish of that woeful life the veil of self-oblivion had closed for ever! He had been dismissed by Alaric, but he had not returned to the city whither he was bidden. Throughout the night he had wandered about the lonely suburbs, striving in secret and horrible suffering for the mastery of his mind.
He had had plenty of leisure on his hands; and thirty years ago, in New York, a young man of leisure had reason to be thankful for aids to self-oblivion. Catherine said nothing to her father about these visits, though they had rapidly become the most important, the most absorbing thing in her life. The girl was very happy.
The Chasseur colored slightly, as he remembered that he had forgotten alike his own position and their relative stations. "I beg your pardon, M. le Viscomte," he said simply, as he gave the salute with ceremonious grace, and passed onward rapidly, as though he wished to forget and to have forgotten the momentary self-oblivion of which he had been guilty.
Even persons of mere artistic sensibility are at times raised by music, painting, or poetry to a momentary trance of self-oblivion, in which they would offer their whole being before the shrine of an invisible loveliness.
The little model's moment of self-oblivion passed, and into her wet eyes her plain, twisting spirit suddenly writhed up again, for all the world as if she had said: 'I won't let you go; I'll keep you I'll keep you. Hilary broke away from her, and she fell forward on her face. "Get up, child," he said "get up; for God's sake, don't lie there!"
The ardor and self-oblivion which present debate occasions, do not exist; and the solemn stillness and fixed gaze of a waiting multitude, serve rather to appal and abash the solitary speaker, than to bring the subject forcibly to his mind. Thus every external circumstance is unpropitious, and it is not strange that relief has been sought in the use of manuscripts.
Once only had He to say, 'If it be possible'; at all other times He prayed as sure that 'Thou hearest Me always, and in this very prayer He speaks in a tone of strange authority, when He prays for all believers in future ages, and says: 'I will that, where I am, they also may be with Me. In this High-priestly prayer, offered when Gethsemane was almost in sight, and the Judgment Hall and Calvary were near, our Lord's tender interest in His disciples fills His mind, and even in its earlier portion, which is in form a series of petitions for Himself, it is in essence a prayer for them, whilst this central section which concerns the Apostles, and the closing section which casts the mantle of His love and care over all who hereafter shall 'believe on Me through their word, witnesses to the sublime completeness of His self-oblivion.
I shall for ever remember that devouring attention, that tender gaiety, that innocent self-oblivion, that glance, still a child's and already a woman's, that happy, as it were flowering smile that never left the half-parted lips and glowing cheeks.... All that Liza had vaguely foreshadowed during our walk in the wood had come to pass now and she, as she gave herself up utterly to love, was at once stiller and brighter, like new wine, which ceases to ferment because its full maturity has come....
"Love-matches." Self-oblivion indicates true love. Proofs of one's being affected by this sentiment. Shakspeare's description of a lover. Jealousy and Timidity indicate love. Overtures. Unrequited love. Rejection of Addresses. I use the expression at the head of this chapter, because of the importance I attach, not only to the sentiment in general, but especially to its earliest developement.
Energy independence individuality disinterested virtue active benevolence self-oblivion universal philanthropy these are the qualities I desire to find, and of which I contend that every succeeding age produces fewer examples.
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