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Updated: May 21, 2025


I hearn Miss Meechim say out to one side to Dorothy, "How sick I am of hearing her constant talk against intemperance; from California to China I have had to hear it. And you know, Dorothy, that folks can drink genteel."

Tommy wanted to know what that meant, and Robert told him that "jot" wuz the smallest letter in the Hebrew alphabet, and "tittle" meant the little horn-shaped mark over some of the letters. And I sez: "I never knew what that meant before." But Miss Meechim said she did she always duz know everything from the beginning, specially after she's hearn some one explain it.

But finally we all did go. As I told Miss Meechim, we could keep up a stiddy thinkin' on better things, if we wuz lookin' on pagan shrines. She said she wuz afraid that Rev. Mr. Weakdew wouldn't approve of her being there, and she didn't seem to enjoy herself very much and I d'no as I did.

Sez Miss Meechim: "Robert knows that I would almost rather have that volcano burst forth its burning lava and wash her away on its bosom than to have her engulfed in that terrible state of matrimony from which I and mine have suffered so horribly."

The man kep' on bowin' and smilin' and I told Josiah, "I presoom he thinks you're praisin' him; he acts as if he did." And Josiah stopped talkin' in a minute. But howsumever he wouldn't take the handkerchief. Miss Meechim and I and I spoze that Robert Strong wuz to the bottom of it but 'tennyrate, we wuz invited to a harem to see a princess, wife of a pasha.

Miss Meechim had never thought on't before, she said she hadn't, but nobody could git her to say a word aginst American customs no more than they could aginst herself. She thinks that she and America are perfect, but puts herself first. Well, America is the best land under the sun; I've always said so.

Yes, as I listened to the awestruck, admirin' axents of the twain with me, them words of the Poet come back to me: "How the light of the hull life dies when love is gone." "Oh," sez Miss Meechim, as we walked back to the tarven, takin' in the sooveneer store on the way, "oh, what a immense body of water! how tumultous it sweeps down into the abyss below!"

She's as pretty as a pink white complected, with wavy, golden hair and sweet, rosy lips and cheeks. And I sez, "Yes, you dear little creater, you may call me aunt in welcome, and we be related in a way," sez I. Sez Miss Meechim, "We shall consider it a great boon if you go with us. And dear little Tommy, it will add greatly to the pleasure of our trip.

A relation on his own side wuz the hostess, and Miss Meechim acted real relieved when it turned out that he had a wife who wuz visiting in England. I sot at the right hand of the Governor-General and I wanted to talk to him on the opium question and try to git him to give up the trade, but concluded that I wouldn't tackle him at his own table. But I kep' up a stiddy thinkin'.

And speakin' of idols, one day we see twelve fat hogs in a temple, where they wuz kept as sacred animals, and here agin Miss Meechim wuz horrified and praised up American doin's, and run down China, and agin Arvilly made remarks.

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