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Updated: May 16, 2025
"Do you know now," said M'Loughlin, "that I think there's a very great difference between little M'Slime, and that Vulture of hell, M'Clutchy. The little fellow came riding past to-day, and seeing me in the field, he beckoned to me: "'I hope, says he, 'that certain reports, which I was sorry to hear of, are unfounded? "'What reports, Mr. M'Slime? says I to him.
"The decision of the court," continued the judge, "is, that your name be struck off the list of Attornies who practice here." In the course of about six weeks afterwards might be read, in all the metropolitan papers, the following announcement: "Died of deep decline in the forty-eighth year of his age, Solomon M'Slime, Esq., Attorney-at-Law.
"I remain, my dear M'Clutchy, with, may I hope, a few of the graces of my calling an earnest wrestler against sin, "Solomon M'Slime." "Now, Darby," said he, having folded the letter enclosing his tender for Harman's farm, and handed, it to him, "now, that so much is despatched, I trust we may have a word or two upon a subject of still higher importance. How do you feel in a spiritual way?
Well, Darby," said M'Slime, quietly changing it for another, "here it is; now, do you see how I commit that letter to the flames?" placing M'Clutchy's under the side of a brief; "and even as the flames die away before your eyes, so dies away not my resentment, Darby, for none do I entertain against him but the memory of his offensive expressions." "Sir," said Darby, "this is wonderful!
The circumstances which we have just described, were too striking not to excite considerable indignation among all reasonable minds at the time. An account of that day's proceedings got into the papers, but was so promptly and fully contradicted by the united testimony of M'Clutchy and M'Slime, that the matter was made to appear very highly complimentary to the benevolence and humanity of both.
M'Slime opposes me in this, because he cannot pocket as much as usual; but though I cannot readily break with him, still, I trust, that in a short time I shall be able to turn his flank in a manner for which he is but little prepared.
"So far from the proceedings in question," the contradiction went on to say, "being marked by the wanton cruelty and inhumanity imputed to them, they were, on the contrary, as remarkable for the kindness and forbearance evinced by Messrs. M'Clutchy and M'Slime. The whole thing was a mere legal form, conducted in a most benevolent and Christian spirit.
I permit you to say as much among your friends in the religious world, whenever you hear the name of Solomon M'Slime mentioned. It is also due to myself to say as much." "I'm afther comin' from Mr. M'Clutchy's, sir," said Darby, "and he desired me to say that he hopes you'll attend at Mr. M'Loughlin's about two o'clock, and not to fail, as its to be a busy day wid him.
Solomon M'Slime, an attorney, is an elder a circumstance which plainly accounts for the heading of the paragraph in the True Blue. "There were, however, about a week or ten days ago, a couple of paragraphs in the True Blue which, by the way, is Mr. M'Clutchy's favorite paper of a very painful description.
"'Brother Cantwell, said Solomon, 'remember to discard self-reliance let thy sup support be from but before he could finish, brother Cantwell turned round, and blandly bowing to him, seemed to say for-he did not speak "'My dear brother M'Slime, I follow your admirable advice; you see I do I shall' "'Mr.
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