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Updated: May 19, 2025


'I should like to know who else is going to be married, if I am not? shrieks out Gruffanuff. 'I should like to know if King Giglio is a gentleman, and if there is such a thing as justice in Paflagonia? Lord Chancellor! my Lord Archbishop! will your Lordships sit by and see a poor, fond, confiding, tender creature put upon? Has not Prince Giglio promised to marry his Barbara?

"No, you wicked beast!" says Gruffanuff, driving her along with the poker driving her down the cold stairs driving her through the cold hall flinging her out into the cold street, so that the knocker itself shed tears to see her! But a kind fairy made the soft snow warm for her little feet, and she wrapped herself up in the ermine of her mantle, and was gone!

Gruffanuff will have to give up all the jewels, laces, snuff-boxes, rings, and watches which belonged to the Queen, Giglio's mother; and Glumboso will be forced to refund two hundred and seventeen thousand millions nine hundred and eighty-seven thousand four hundred and thirty-nine pounds, thirteen shillings, and sixpence halfpenny, money left to Prince Giglio by his poor dear father."

A splendid luncheon was served to the Royal party, of which the Archbishop, the Chancellor, Duke Hedzoff, Countess Gruffanuff, and all our friends partook, the Fairy Blackstick being seated on the left of King Giglio, with Bulbo and Angelica beside her. You could hear the joy-bells ringing in the capital, and the guns which the citizens were firing off in honor of their Majesties.

You old wretch, what will you take to let me off? Help the Queen, some one Her Majesty has fainted. But Gruffanuff flung her arms round the Archbishop's neck, and bellowed out, 'Justice, justice, my Lord Chancellor! so loudly, that her piercing shrieks caused everybody to pause.

"And now," says she, "when her Majesty rings her bell twice, I'll trouble you, miss, to attend." So when the Queen's bell rang twice, Betsinda came to her Majesty and made a pretty little curtsey. The Queen, the Princess, and Gruffanuff were all three in the room. As soon as they saw her they began, "You wretch!" says the Queen. "You little vulgar thing!" says the Princess.

As for Giglio, he never left Madam Gruffanuff all this time, but stood with her in the embrasure of a window, paying her compliments. At length the Groom of the Chambers announced His Royal Highness the Prince of Crim Tartary! and the noble company went into the royal dining-room.

And he never thought about Angelica, now Princess Bulbo, whom he had left at home, and who, as we know, did not care much about him. The King, dancing the twenty-fifth polka with Rosalba, remarked with wonder the ring she wore; and then Rosalba told him how she had got it from Gruffanuff, who no doubt had picked it up when Angelica flung it away.

But we must now revert to Giglio and Betsinda. Gruffanuff, who had seen what had happened with the King, and knew that Giglio must come to grief, got up very early the next morning, and went to devise some plans for rescuing her darling husband, as the silly old thing insisted on calling him. 'Well, dear Giglio, says Gruff. 'Well, dear Gruffy, says Giglio, only HE was quite satirical.

And the old Archbishop, taking out his eyeglasses, read "This is to give notice, that I, Giglio, only son of Savio, King of Paflagonia, hereby promise to marry the charming Barbara Griselda Countess Gruffanuff, and widow of the late Jenkins Gruffanuff, Esq." "H'm," says the Archbishop, "the document is certainly a a document."

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