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Updated: May 20, 2025
But it ain't three days after the engagement got noised around that a cousin of Elsa's shows up, a Mrs. Montgomery Pulsifer a swell party with a big place in the Berkshires. Seems she'd been kind of cold and distant to Miss Hampton on account of her bein' a concert singer; but, now that Elsa has drawn down a prize like Robert Ellins, here comes Mrs.
Ellins, "you induce him to break his word to me and you hide him in another hotel." "Something like that," admits Auntie, squarin' her jaw. "Why not, Mr. Ellins?" "Why, Auntie!" gasps Vee. "Verona!" says Auntie, shootin' over a reprovin' look. "But see here," protests Old Hickory. "I was arranging with this man to fit out a treasure-hunting expedition. He had made a verbal contract with me.
Ellins!" says I. "I thought you was down at the Springs?" "Didn't think I'd been banished for life, did you?" says he. "But Mr. Robert," I goes on, "didn't look for you until " "No doubt," he breaks in. "Robert and those fool doctors would have kept me soaking in those infernal mud baths until I turned into a crocodile. I know.
"All right," I goes on. "Now the address, Tink. Jersey, eh? Well, it's likely you'll hear from Mr. Ellins before the week's out. But don't get your hopes up; for he turns down enough propositions to fill a waste basket every day. Express elevator at No. 5. So long," and I chokes off Mr. Tuttle's vote of thanks by wavin' him out the door.
Robert gets a 'phone call, and by the worried look I knew something was up. "Yes," says he, "this is Robert Ellins. Yes, I know such a person. That's right Clifford. He's my cousin. No, is that so? Why, there must be some mistake. Oh, there must be! I'll come up and explain. Yes, I'll sign the bail bond."
The Doc does his best to soothe him down and fin'lly persuades him to tackle his mutton broth without the Martini. It's a good enough feed; but kind of plain, about what you'd get in one of these Eighth-ave. joints, four courses for thirty-five cents. Mr. Ellins gets left again when he calls for a demitasse after the tapioca pudding. Nothing doing in the coffee line. "Huh!" he grunts.
Forget?" says I. "Say, Miss Vee, I'll keep right on rememberin' that spiel we had together until breathin' goes out of fashion and then some! Gee! but I'm glad you happened along!" "But how is it," says she, "that you " "Special commission," says I. "I'm waitin' here for Mr. Robert Ellins." "Oh!" says she. "And have you had some salad and sandwiches?"
You know lights dimmed, throbby music from the bull fiddle and kettle drums, and the ushers seatin' nobody durin' the act. Belasco stuff. The stage showin' the private office of the Corrugated Trust. It's a case of the big four in solemn conclave. Maybe you can guess the other three. Uh-huh! Old Hickory Ellins, Mr. Robert, and Piddie.
I'd loaded him into an elevator and was strollin' through the waitin'-room, when Old Hickory comes paddin' out as slinky as a man of his weight can. "Young man," says he, "where is that Captain person?" "About the tenth floor by now, sir," says I. "Bring him back," says Mr. Ellins, sharp and snappy. "Through the private entrance. Understand?"
After one glance around the group she picks out Old Hickory, makes straight for him, and grabs one of his big paws in both hands. "Mr. Ellins, is it not?" says she. "Please forgive my coming in like this, but I did want to tell you how grateful I am for all that you have done for dear Vincent and me. It was so generous and kind of you?" "Ye-e-es?" says Old Hickory, sort of draggy and encouragin'.
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