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But it must be very pretty nonsense, and not like that silly hey diddle diddle! the cat and the fiddle! I wish I could get it out of my head. I wonder what the angels' nonsense is like. Nonsense is a very good thing, ain't it, mother? a little of it now and then; more of it for baby, and not so much for grown people like cabmen and their mothers?
It was a very big estimate. We talked and shilly-shallied till Sir Charles grew angry. He lost his temper at last. "They know I'm a millionaire, Sey," he said, "and they're playing the old game of trying to diddle me. But I won't be diddled. Except Colonel Clay, no man has ever yet succeeded in bleeding me. And shall I let myself be bled as if I were a chamois among these innocent mountains?
I reason a priori, and a diddle would be no diddle without a grin. The origin of the diddle is referrable to the infancy of the Human Race. Perhaps the first diddler was Adam. At all events, we can trace the science back to a very remote period of antiquity. The moderns, however, have brought it to a perfection never dreamed of by our thick-headed progenitors.
Let them talk of their spinnet and sinnet, their fiddle and their diddle, their dancing and their prancing, but there is no genteel accomplishment able to be compared to a rousing whistle on the fingers. See what it did for us to-night. My soul to glory, but only for it, Mr. However, God's good, and, after all, boys, you see there is nothing like an accomplished education.
"He's hellish angry," they grinned to each other when their foe was gone, and laughed when they heard the cause of it. "Ha, ha, Wilson's the boy to diddle him!" And yet they looked queer when told that the famous stick had snapped in his grasp like a worm-eaten larch-twig. "Lord!" cried the baker in admiring awe, "did he break it with the ae chirt!
Yes, doctor, there's only one breed that flourishes, and you don't need me to tell you which it is. Here they lie" and he nodded to right and left of him "dreamin' o' their money-bags, and their dividends, and their profits, and how they'll diddle and swindle one another afresh, soon as the sun gets up to-morrow. Harder 'n nails they are, and sharp as needles.
Come, come, come an' shake 'ands with me Down by the ole Bull and Bush. Wot cheer me little Germin band! Fol the diddle di do! Come an' take 'old of me 'and Come, come, come an' 'ave a drink with me, Down by the old Bull and Bush, Bush! Bush!
"Then, if you don't ken, why the damn should you quarrel? It's a dam'd silly thing to fecht at ony time, but it's a dam'd sicht sillier to fecht withoot haein' a quarrel at a'," cried Davie, now fairly roused. "That's jist hoo they diddle us. They diddle the workers o' France an' ither countries in the same way.
I have nothing to sing about those glorious fellows, except 'God save the Queen and them. I tell you the whole thing stuns me, so I cannot sit down to make fiddle rhyme with diddle about it or blundered with hundred like Alfred Tennyson. He is no Tyrtaeus, though he has a glimpse of what Tyrtaeus ought to be. But I have not even that; and am going rabbit shooting to-morrow instead.
And the over-conscientious finder takes the fifty with marked reluctance, and throws the gentleman the book, as desired, while the steamboat fumes and fizzes on her way. In about half an hour after her departure, the "large amount" is seen to be a "counterfeit presentment," and the whole thing a capital diddle. A bold diddle is this.
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