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Updated: June 16, 2025
'This wiseacre, said he, 'is still abed; and I think the best thing he can do is to sleep on till Christmas; for when he gets up he does nothing but expose his own folly. In the beginning of the war he told me in a great fright that thirty thousand French had marched from Acadia to Cape Breton. Where did they find transports? said I. Transports! cried he, I tell you they marched by land.
She would wake from those reveries with a laugh, and give me a push to send me rolling down a bank. "What's the matter, Davy? You look as solemn as a wood-owl. What a little wiseacre you be!" Once I retorted, "You were thinking of that Tom McChesney." "Ay, that she was, I'll warrant," snapped her grandfather.
"No, please don't! pray don't!" cried Lucy, clasping her hands in feeble-minded distress. "In this neighborhood one of the right sort." "I am so happy as I am." "You will be happier when you are quite a slave, and so I shall save you from being snapped up by some country wiseacre, and marry you into our own set."
That evening, at my club, I heard men talking of him. One said: "What's the use of a fellow wasting himself on a lot of savages?" and another wiseacre opined: "Oh, he went off because there was friction at home. A fellow like that, who knew the East, would have got through all right if he'd taken the proper precautions.
And if any of us inquired, "What is Epaphroditus doing?" the answer was, "He is consulting about so and so with Felicion." Had he not sold him as good-for-nothing? Who had in a trice converted him into a wiseacre? This is what comes of holding of importance anything but the things that depend on the Will. What you shun enduring yourself, attempt not to impose on others.
The conclusion of Act ii and the commencement of Act iii; also the discovery of Florio and Rosaura in Act v. p. 186 London Cuckolds. This immensely popular play, five merry side-splitting acts which kept the stage for a century, was produced in 1682 at Dorset Garden. Ravenscroft has no less than three cuckolds in his Dramatis Personae: Doodle, Dashwell, and Wiseacre.
If the truth must be told, the sage Leibnitz had a wisdom which now looks dreadfully like that of a wiseacre! In Mathematics even, he did invent the Differential Calculus, but it is certain also he never could believe in Newton's System of the Universe, nor would read the PRINCIPIA at all.
"Ay, ay," answered Timothy, "your honour has a mortal good hand at giving a flap with a fox's tail, as the saying is 't is a wonderment you did not try your hand on that there wiseacre that stole your honour's harness, and wants to be an arrant with a murrain to 'un. Lord help his fool's head, it becomes him as a sow doth a cart saddle."
"That's the question for your deep brain, Miss Wiseacre," said Archie. "Perhaps you're equal to this. If three men work all day on a fertile farm, what is the logarithm?" "The lager-in-'em?" echoed Cricket. "Depends on how much they drank." Whereupon Mrs. Somers and the boys laughed themselves sore, and the girls clamoured to know the joke.
"Aw, he handed 'em a lemon!" commented the wiseacre. "That boat'll never run it won't even float!" But Harry Stanton's cruising launch was no lemon. It proved to be staunch and solid. There wasn't a rotten plank in her.
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