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"Capital!" agreed that suave man of the world, who had been bored as near extinction as makes no matter. "Congratulate you, my boy!" "You clever, clever thing!" said Mrs Peagrim, skittishly striking her nephew on the knee with her fan. "I'm proud to be your aunt! Aren't you proud to know him, Mr Rooke?"

He was wondering if after all there was not something to be said for the methods of the caveman when he went a-wooing. Twinges of conscience the caveman may have had when all was over, but at least he had established his right to look after the woman he loved. "They tell me . . . I am told . . . I am informed . . . No, one moment, Miss Frisby." Mrs Peagrim wrinkled her fair forehead.

"Wasn't that part an Englishman before?" asked Mrs Peagrim. "I thought so. Well, it was a stroke of genius changing it. This Scotchman is too funny for words. And such an artist!" Freddie rose shakily. One can stand just so much. "Think," he mumbled, "I'll be pushing along and smoking a cigarette." He groped his way to the door.

Peagrim maternally. "Poor boy! I don't wonder, after all the nervousness and excitement . . . You sit quite still and rest. I will be back in a moment." She bustled out of the room, and Mr Pilkington sagged back into his chair. He had hardly got his meditations going once more, when the door opened and the maid announced "Major Selby."

The problem was how to keep up the er innocent deception after we had reached New York. A woman like Mrs Waddesleigh Peagrim a ghastly creature, my dear, all front teeth and exuberance, but richer than the Sub-Treasury looks askance at a man, however agreeable, if he endeavors to cement a friendship begun on board ship from a cheap boarding-house on Amsterdam Avenue.

Uncle Chris quivered slightly, but braced himself to do his duty. "May I have the pleasure . . . ?" he began, then broke off as he saw the man who had come out of the box behind his hostess. "Underhill!" He grasped his hand and shook it warmly. "My dear fellow! I had no notion that you had arrived!" "Sir Derek came just a moment ago," said Mrs Peagrim. "How are you, Major Selby?" said Derek.

He has invited a very rich woman, who has been showing him a lot of hospitality, a Mrs Peagrim . . ." "Mrs Waddesleigh Peagrim?" "Yes? Why, do you know her?" "Quite well. She goes in a good deal for being Bohemian and knowing people who write and paint and act and so on. That reminds me. I gave Freddie Rooke a letter of introduction to her." "Freddie Rooke!" "Yes.

"It is a sovereign specific. You can get it at any drug-store. It comes in two sizes, the dollar-fifty or large size, and the . . ." Mrs Peagrim rose majestically. "Major Selby, I am tired . . ." "Precisely. And, as I say, Nervino . . ." "Please," said Mrs. Peagrim coldly, "go to the stage-door and see if you can find my limousine. It should be waiting in the street."

I am no physician myself, I speak as a layman, but it acts on the red corpuscles of the blood . . ." Mrs Peagrim's face was stony. She had not spoken before, because he had given her no opportunity, but she spoke now in a hard voice. "Major Selby!" "Mrs Peagrim?" "I am not interested in patent medicines!" "One can hardly call Nervino that," said Uncle Chris reproachfully.

I must be staggering off now. Lot of things to do." "Oh, must you go already?" "Absolutely must. Lot of things to do." Uncle Chris extended a hand to his hostess. "I think I will be going along, too, Mrs Peagrim. I'll walk a few yards with you, Freddie my boy. There are one or two things I would like to talk over. Till tonight, Mrs Peagrim." "Till tonight, Major Selby."