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Updated: May 21, 2025
Here is one which he gave to ten people, in 1660, which he proudly terms "a very fine dinner." "A dish of marrow-bones; a leg of mutton; a loin of veal; a dish of fowl; three pullets, and two dozen of larks, all in a dish; a great tart; a neat's tongue; a dish of anchovies; a dish of prawns, and cheese."
Here, said she, turning towards her gentlewomen, bring my scrubbing-brushes, you know which, to scrape, rake, and clear their palates. They brought immediately some stately, swingeing, jolly hams, fine substantial neat's tongues, good hung-beef, pure and delicate botargos, venison, sausages, and such other gullet-sweepers.
"I'd know the young cub in a thousand." Captain Twinely rose, tools the lamp from the hook where it hung, held it close to Neat's face, and looked at him. "I believe you're right," he said. "Now, young man, we know who you are; You're Neal Ward." He drew a paper from his pocket and looked it over.
Take a large pig's head, cut off the groin ends, crack the bones and put it in water, shift it once or twice, cut off the ears, then boil it so tender that the bones will slip out, nick it with a knife in the thick part of the head, throw over it a pretty large handful of salt; take half a dozen of large neat's feet, boil them while they be soft, split them, and take out all the bones and black bits; take a strong coarse cloth, and lay the feet with the skin side downwards, with all the loose pieces in the inside; press them with your hand to make them of an equal thickness, lay them at that length that they will reach round the head, and throw over them a handful of salt, then lay the head across, one thick part one way and the other another, that the fat may appear alike at both ends; leave one foot out to lay at the top to make a lantern to reach round, bind it with filleting as you would do brawn, and tie it very close at both ends; you may take it out of the cloth the next day, take off the filleting and wash it, wrap it about again very tight, and keep it in brawn-pickle.
Breakfast at this period was a much more substantial affair than a modern morning repast, and differed little from dinner or supper, except in respect to quantity. On the present occasion, there were carbonadoes of fish and fowl, a cold chine, a huge pasty, a capon, neat's tongues, sausages, botargos, and other matters as provocative of thirst as sufficing to the appetite.
Saxon burst out laughing, and leaned back in his seat with his long legs stretched straight out and his hands in his breeches pockets. 'This is too much! he said at last. 'I saw many difficulties in my way, yet I did not foresee this one. You are in very truth the most contrary man that ever stood in neat's leather.
Because the follicles are fagged. What are the follicles?..." So it went on to the climax that the Hair Stimulant contained all "The essential principles of that most reviving tonic, Tono-Bungay, together with an emollient and nutritious oil derived from crude Neat's Foot Oil by a process of refinement, separation and deodorization.... It will be manifest to any one of scientific attainments that in Neat's Foot Oil derived from the hoofs and horns of beasts, we must necessarily have a natural skin and hair lubricant."
No sooner were these words spoken, when Panurge coming up towards her, after the ceremonial performance of a profound and humble salutation, presented her with six neat's tongues dried in the smoke, a great butter-pot full of fresh cheese, a borachio furnished with good beverage, and a ram's cod stored with single pence, newly coined.
This Mahomet Bassa, in a dispute he once had with the Spanish Consul, said: "My mother sold Sheep's Trotters, and my father Neat's Tongues; but they would have been ashamed to expose for sale on their stalls a Tongue so worthless as thine." Mahomet Bassa was, like most of the Turks, a man of Pleasure, and his Harem was furnished with an extraordinary number of choice Beauties.
Yet all said and done a noble Dinner, enough and to spare, being a dish of Marrowbones, a legg of Mutton, a loin of Veal, a dish of fowl, being three Pullets and 24 Larks all in a great dish, a Tart, a neat's tongue, a dish of anchovies, a dish of Prawns and cheese.
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