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Updated: May 31, 2025
My deportment, at an interview so much desired and so wholly unforeseen, was that of a maniac. The petrifying influence of surprise yielded to the impetuosities of passion. I held him in my arms; I wept upon his bosom; I sobbed with emotion which, had it not found passage at my eyes, would have burst my heart-strings.
The connection continued: widened and deepened itself, in a slow tentative manner; passing naturally from voluntary into remunerated: and indeed proving more and more to be the true ultimate arena, and battle-field and seed-field, for the exuberant impetuosities and faculties of this man.
It then comprehends the great evil that has befallen us through the sin of Adam in robbing us of this liberty. This prayer I had before the raptures and the great impetuosities I have been speaking of.
That was what Tom did for her, made her forget things, and return to the mood of youth where all seemed shining and gay. She did that for him, too, amused and distracted him, with her little impetuosities and girlish frankness. "You are such a good fellow you put heart into a man," he had said.
On the contrary, he told him to console me, that there was nothing to be afraid of, and not to direct me along a road so narrow, but to leave the operations of the Spirit of God alone; for now and then it seemed as if these great impetuosities of the spirit took away the very breath of the soul. The rector came to see me, and my confessor bade me speak to him in all freedom and openness.
Yet when minds are imbued with a genuine sympathy, are not words and looks superfluous? Are not motion and touch sufficient to impart feelings such as mine? Has he not eyed me at moments, when the pressure of his hand has thrown me into tumults, and was it possible that he mistook the impetuosities of love, for the eloquence of indignation? But the hastening evening will decide.
When these impetuosities are not very violent they seem to admit of a little mitigation at least, the soul seeks some relief, because it knows not what to do through certain penances; the painfulness of which, and even the shedding of its blood, are no more felt than if the body were dead.
"I fear I shall not be believed, but that is the story of this crime, gentlemen." Was it? Tragedies as unpremeditated as this had doubtless occurred, and inconsistencies in character shown themselves in similar impetuosities, from the beginning of time up till now.
My journey would, by these means, be considerably prolonged; but on that head I was indifferent, or rather, considering how far the night had already advanced, it was desirable not to reach home till the dawn. I proceeded in this new direction with speed. Time, however, was allowed for my impetuosities to subside, and for sober thoughts to take place. Still I persisted in this path.
We felt it necessary to pause for a moment to express this reflection before entering upon the recital of the facts presented by the history of this period, and to intimate that, notwithstanding this consolatory reflection, we have found it incumbent upon us to pass over many details too odious to occupy a place in our pages, sighing in spirit at those guilty acts which it was necessary to record, as in relating the life of a virtuous old man, we should lament over the impetuosities of his passionate youth, or over the corrupt tendencies of his riper age.
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