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Updated: June 22, 2025
The Shakespeare poem Tomorrow Is My Birthday is not only one of the worst effusions of Mr. Masters' pen, it is almost sacrilege. Good friend, for Jesus' sake, forbear! Outside of the monologues and the epitaphs, the work of Mr. Masters is mainly unimpressive. Yet I admire his ambition to write on various subjects and in various metres.
I told that wicked Captain L of Dummer so the other Sunday; 'an', says he, 'if you don't hold your confounded jaw, you old fool, I'll kick you there. Now ma'am now, sir, was not that bad manners in a gentleman, to use such appropriate epitaphs to a humble servant of God, like I?" And thus the old man ran on for an hour, dilating upon his own merits and the sins of his neighbors.
The epitaphs of the first two Scipios are a good criterion of the state of literary acquirement at the time. They are apparently uninfluenced by Greek models, and certainly do not present a high standard either of poetical thought or expression. The fact, also, that the Romans possessed no native term for a poet is highly significant.
There are twenty-four tombs and many graves upon whose ancient, moss-covered headstones we trace familiar names and some unusual epitaphs. The tombs of Dr. Thomas Gray and the Greenough family, side by side, are particularly noticeable, as, unlike the others, they have a large bull's-eye of ground glass inserted in the doors, evidently to admit light into "the chamber of death."
And sometimes all who had loved the lost were themselves among the missing. The full roll call of names could never be made out; extraordinary mistakes were committed. Men whom the world deemed dead and buried came back, like ghosts, to read their own epitaphs.
The monuments, mostly large erections of the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries, were dignified if luxuriant, and the epitaphs and heraldry were copious. The central space of the domed room was occupied by three copper sarcophagi, covered with finely-engraved ornament. Two of them had, as is commonly the case in Denmark and Sweden, a large metal crucifix on the lid.
On December 2, he sent directions for inscribing epitaphs for his father, mother, and brother on a memorial slab in St. Michael's Church, Lichfield. On December 8 and 9 he made his will; and on Monday, December 13, he expired about seven o'clock in the evening, with so little apparent pain that his attendants hardly perceived when his dissolution took place.
Broken tablets, retaining a few letters of the epitaphs of the dead; mutilated statues and alto-relievos; drums and capitals of pillars; a hand or a foot, or a fold of marble drapery, every form and variety of sculpture, the mere crumbs that had fallen from a profuse feast of artistic beauty, which nobody considers it worth while to pick up, lie mouldering among the grass.
The chief of the aeronautic establishment near West Point was Cabot Sinclair, and he allowed himself but one single moment of the posturing that was so universal in that democratic time. "We have chosen our epitaphs," he said to a reporter, "and we are going to have, 'They did all they could. Now run away!" The curious thing is that they did all do all they could; there is no exception known.
To his familiars he is like a plague, whom they dare scarce come nigh for fear of infection; he is a monument ruined by those which raised him, he spends the day with a hei mihi! væ miserum! and the night with a nullis est medicabilis herbis. In 1626 year of the death of Francis Bacon appeared "Cures for the Itch; Characters, Epigrams, Epitaphs by H. P." with the motto "Scalpat qui Tangitur."
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