Vietnam or Thailand ? Vote for the TOP Country of the Week !
Updated: May 27, 2025
"Mr Weener," he said, "I am authorized to offer you six times six times," he echoed impressively, "the amount of your original investment. This is an amazing return." If it was worth it to him, it was worth it to me. "I will take immediate delivery," I repeated firmly. "And no brokerage fees involved," he added, as one making an unbelievable concession. I shook my head.
About the same time I also received a letter which somehow got through the protective screening of my secretaries: "Albert Weener, Savoy Hotel, Thames Embankment, WC1. "Sir: You may recall making an offer I considered premature. It is now no longer so. Josephine Spencer Francis" In spite of her rudeness at our last meeting, my good nature caused me to send a cab for her.
"You know, Weener, the jackass who said Christmas mightnt have been so far out afterall." She seemed very confident. Came home relieved of all my recent pessimism and brought my book down to the overrunning of the United States. I am not a morbid man, but I pray I may live to set foot on my native soil once again. August 16: No new reports from France. Can the Grass be slowing down?
Asleep on your bloody feet, ay, somnambulistic offspring of a threetoed sloth? Wait all night for a story and then not get it, like the star legman on the Jackson Junior Highschool Jive-Jitterbug. I'll never be able to hold my head up again. Say something, say something, Weener Ive got to get this."
Now I am not a drinking man myself. I limit my imbibing to an occasional glass of beer on account of the yeast it contains, which I consider beneficial. I hope, however, I am no prig or puritan and so I asked casually if he would care to stop in for an appetizer. "Well, now you mention it, Mr Weener ... hum ... fact is ... don't mind if I do."
Due either to Le ffaçasé's perverse sense of humor or, what is more likely, his excessive meanness with money, my collect telegram asking for funds to return from Yuma received the following ridiculous reply: KNOW NO SANGUINARY WEENER INTELLIGENCER NO ELEEMOSYNARY INSTITUTION EAT CAKE. The meaning of the last two words escaped me and it was possible they were added purely to make the requisite ten.
It was a queer place for Albert Weener, the crackerjack salesman who had once led his team in a national contest to put over a threepiece aluminum deal, to be working out of. And for a woman. And for such a woman....
November 8: Another test. Almost completely successful. F certain the next one will do it. My emotions are exhausted. November 9: I have completed my history of the Grass down to the commencement of this diary. I shall take a wellearned rest from my literary labors for a few days. F announces a new test "the final one, Weener, the final one" for tomorrow.
August 6: Interview with S C. Offered him all the facilities now at the disposal of F. I admitted I was not without influence and could almost promise him a knighthood or an earldom. He said, "Mr Weener, I don't need the offer of reward; I'm doing my best right now. But I'm proceeding along entirely different lines than Miss Francis.
Get down to whatever smokefilled and tastelessly decorated room that committee is meeting in and do not leave while it is in session, neither to eat, sleep, nor move those bowels whose possession I gravely doubt. You hear me, Weener?" For some reason the committee was not attempting to get the story of the grass in chronological order.
Word Of The Day
Others Looking