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Updated: June 8, 2025
Robert was the only happy one. A few difficulties seemed to him to make the expedition more real. He came dripping into the Slowcoach and asked for his supper; but Horace was still hunting for the tin-opener. "Never mind about it," said Robert. "I'll open the thing with the hammer and a knife. But what you want, Horace, is system." "No; what I want is food," said Horace. "I'm dying."
"Kink, does it ruin potatoes and things to stew too long?" "Kink, is there any decent way of opening a tin without a tin-opener?" "I'm perfectly certain the sugar was in this cupboard. Gregory, have you been at the sugar?" "It's a good deal harder than a rock, still." "Can you make a tin-opener out of a fork?" "I am perfectly certain I saw the corkscrew this morning."
Horace, after great difficulty, wrote: DEAR X., "I am having a top-hole holiday in the caravan you gave the Avories. I am the Keeper of the Tin-opener. "Yours truly, Hester wrote: DEAR X., "I have long wanted to write to you and tell you that we adore the Slowcoach, which is the name we have given your caravan, and think you were awfully clever to think of it and to make it so complete.
He tried to buy them off with macaroons, but the plan failed, as a similar one did in the case of the Anglo-Saxon king and the Danes. The children, like the Norse pirates, returned almost immediately in increased numbers. Then Priscilla appeared. "I thought I should have had a frightful rag with Brannigan over the tin-opener," she said, "but he was quite nice about it.
But I thought if I sent something along that we could all join in consuming instantly, I couldn't possibly do any harm." "We haven't any champagne glasses," said Sissie coldly. "Champagne glasses, child! You ought never to drink champagne out of champagne glasses. Tumblers are the only thing for champagne. Some tumblers, Ozzie. And a tin-opener. You must have a tin-opener.
I feel convinced you have a tin-opener. Upon my soul, Eve, I was right after all. I am hungry, but my hunger is nothing to my thirst. I'm beginning to suspect that I must be the average sensual man." "Arthur!" Eve warned him. "If you eat any of that caviare you're bound to be ill." "Not if I mix it with pâté de foi gras, my pet.
"Baker, what fruit did I tell you grew in the West Indies?" "Pineapples, sir." "Very good, Baker. Bring me those two tins of pineapple and the tin-opener. Plenty for you all." My lessons were quite enormously popular with my pupils, though the matron complained that the boys seemed liable to bilious attacks after them.
It gets so soppy when it's the least wet. There's no use having more of it than we can help. Peaches. He hadn't any of the small one and sixpenny tins, so I had to spend your other shilling to make up the half-crown for the big one. I hope you don't mind. We shall be able to finish it all right I expect. Oh, bother! I forgot that the peaches require a tin-opener. Have you a knife?
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