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Updated: May 10, 2025
Thompson is a determined and aspiring man; is earnest, windy, and clerically "large;" knows he is a parson without being told of it; has a somewhat ponderous and flatulent style of articulation; has not the faculty of originality much developed, but can imitate excellently; could sooner quote than coin a great thought; believes in stray polemical struggles with outsiders; used to have a Byronic notion that getting hold of other people's thoughts, and passing them off for those of somebody else, was not a very great sin; is a better anecdote teller than reasoner; can be very solemn and most virtuously combative; could yet, though he seems to have settled down, get up, on the shortest notice, any amount of "immortal William" steam, and throw every ounce of it into a good ninth-rate jeremiad.
Now do they learn to laugh at themselves: do I hear rightly? My virile food taketh effect, my strong and savoury sayings: and verily, I did not nourish them with flatulent vegetables! But with warrior-food, with conqueror-food: new desires did I awaken. New hopes are in their arms and legs, their hearts expand. They find new words, soon will their spirits breathe wantonness.
The young gentlemen themselves are commonly misled by their pedagogue at school, their tutor at the university, or their governor in their travels, and many of these three sorts are the most positive blockheads in the world. How many of these flatulent writers have I known who have sunk in their reputation after seven or eight editions of their works! for indeed they are poets only for young men.
While aware that much can be said even in behalf of all this, we perceive that we have not now to consider the question of what is demanded to serve a half-starved and barbarous nation, or set of nations, but what is most applicable, most pertinent, for numerous congeries of conventional, over-corpulent societies, already becoming stifled and rotten with flatulent, infidelistic literature, and polite conformity and art.
For the fruit, being new and flatulent, raises many disturbing vapors in the body; for it is not likely that only wine ferments, or new oil only makes a noise in the lamp, the heat agitating its vapor; but new corn and all sorts of fruit are plump and distended, till the unconcocted flatulent vapor is broke away.
His story is not so pleasing as Ariosto's; he is too flatulent sometimes, and sometimes too dry; many times unequal, and almost always forced; and, besides, is full of conceits, points of epigram, and witticisms; all which are not only below the dignity of heroic verse, but contrary to its nature: Virgil and Homer have not one of them.
And who of our persecutors would believe that the song we bear in our hearts, some of us, I may speak at least for one, is the most inspired, the most spiritual challenge ever flung to your obtuse, flatulent, stertorous England: Bring me my bow of burning gold, Bring me my arrows of desire, Bring me my spear; O clouds unfold! Bring me my chariot of fire!
Then shall the pallid constable flee side by side with the detected thief. Blaze! he cried, 'blaze, derided city! Fall, flatulent monarchy, fall like Dagon! With these words his foot slipped upon the lead; and but for Somerset's quickness, he had been instantly precipitated into space.
Bulwer's style; the poetising, which may be likened unto the flatulent turnips and carrots; and the politics, which are as the gravy, reeking of filthy garlic, greasy with rancid oil; even so, we say, pursuing this savoury simile to its fullest extent, the natural qualities of young Pelham the wholesome and juicy mutton of the mind, is shrunk and stewed away.
"It's no good quoting Marcus Aurelius," said Tarvrille, "to a chap with his finger in the crack of a door." "I suppose it isn't," I said. "One doesn't want to be a flatulent ass of course," said Tarvrille, "still " He resumed with an air of plunging. "It will sound just rot to you now, Stratton, but after all it comes to this. Behind us is a situation with half-a-dozen particular persons.
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