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Updated: July 27, 2025
The Cornet Band rode all round town in one, and so on over to the "scene of the festivities" as the Weekly Examiner very aptly put it, and then both 'buses stood out in front of the American House, waiting for passengers, with Dinny Enright calling out: "This sway t' the Fair Groun's! Going RIGHT over!" Only he always waited till he got a good load before he turned a wheel. Did you know that?
Phadrick, lie down till I illusthrate." "How is that, Dinny? I can hear you sittin'." "Lie down, you reptile, or I shall decline the narration altogether." "Arra, lie down, Phadrick; sure he only wants to show you the rason o' the thing." "Well, well; I'm down. Now Dinny, don't let your feet be too larned, if you plase." "Silence! taceto! you reptile.
Dinny Dempsey, who will also be seen on the stage in native Irish costume and full regalia. Then, Smith, you can trot out one of your well-known comic monologues that you are so famous in. After that we'll wind up with 'The Strollers' Medley, in which all the company will take part, and Daisey De Vere can do a favorite stunt of dancing now and then to fill up the gap. Now, then, go to work.
"Why, what's this all about?" "That's what I want to know. I borrowed a five-pound-note off of him a fortnight ago when I was drunk, an' now he sends me that." "Well, I never would have dream'd that of Dinny," says the cousin, scratching his head and blinking. "What's come over him at all?" "That's what I want to know." "What have you been doing to the man?"
'There were a lot of new chums in the big room at the back, drinking and dancing and singing, and Tom says to Dinny "Dinny, I'll bet you a quid an' the Flour'll run against some of those new chums before he's an hour on the spot." 'But Dinny wouldn't take him up. He knew the Flour. "Good day, Tom! Good day, Dinny!" "Good day to you, Flour!" 'I was introduced.
"Why, you don't know at all what I could do by larnin'. It would be no throuble to me to divide myself into two halves, an' argue the one agin the other." "You would, in throth, Dinny." "Ay, father, or cut myself acrass, an' dispute my head, maybe, agin my heels." "Throth, would you!" "Or practise logic wid my right hand, and bate that agin wid my left." "The sarra lie in it."
Byrne cried: "What's wrong?" Mrs. Cregan did not hear. She stampeded to the door in the ponderous fright of a panic-stricken elephant. Her one thought was to find a place where she might get on her knees.... Cregan! It was himself! It was Dinny! Killed, maybe! She had blasphemed against the Church and Father Dumphy, and she must pray. She must pray for herself and for Cregan.
There's no discrimination at all atween black an' white. They're both of the same color so long as you keep your eyes shut." "But if a man happens to open his eyes, Dinny?" "He has no right to open them, Phadrick, if he wants to prove the truth of a thing. I should have said probe but it does not significate." "The heavens mark you to grace, Dinny. You did that in brave style.
An' what is still more, he could, by shuttin' your eyes, in the same way prove black to be white, an' white black, jist as asy." "Surely myself doesn't doubt it. I suppose, by shuttin' my eyes, the same lad could prove anything to me." "But, Dinny, avourneen, you didn't prove Phadrick to be an ass yit. Will you do that by histhory, too, Dinny, or by the norrations of Illocution?"
Now, Phadrick, listen, for you must decide betune us." "Orra, have you no other larnin' than that to argue upon? Sure if you call upon me to decide, I must give it agin Dinny. Why my judgment won't be worth a hap'orth, if he makes an ass of me!" "What matther how you decide, man alive, if he proves you to be one; sure that is all we want.
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