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Updated: May 25, 2025


"Yes," sez the dantless Arvilly, "I mean jest what I say; them that refuse to vote and help in the matter are jest as guilty as license voters; they are consentin' to the crucifixion of Christ in man. And the poor drunkards are not the only ones they help nail to the cross.

But I pray, sister Arvilly, I pray without ceasing that the Holy Spirit will come down, and smite these offenders." Sez Arvilly, "If you should depend on prayer alone to keep your big shanghai rooster from fightin' the little bantys I guess you would be apt to have considerable of a wake in your hen-yard.

Sez Arvilly, "I would talk about pity and mercy, you that know no pity and no mercy for your own wimmen and children.

Well, it has helped the undertaker, the jail and the poorhouse. Well, the next day Arvilly come down lookin' white and peaked, but didn't say anything about her eclipse; no, the darkness wuz too awful and solemn to talk about. But she showed me Waitstill's letter.

She wuz in front of a good, meek-lookin' freckled woman, a-canvassin' her. Or, that is, she wuzn't exactly applyin' the canvas to her, but she wuz a-preparin' her for it. It seemed that she had been introduced to her, and wuz a-goin' to call on her the next day with the book. Sez I, advancin' onto her, "Arvilly Lanfear, did you really git here alive and well?"

But here she is." And, sure enough, she that wuz Arvilly Lanfear advanced, puttin' some money in her pocket, she had sold her book. Well, I wuz surprised, but glad, for I pitied Arvilly dretfully for what she had went through, and liked her. Two passengers had gin up goin' at the last minute or they couldn't have got tickets.

"Yes," sez Arvilly, "and you are his murderer. Not the Spaniards, not the foe of this govermunt that the poor young fellow tried with a boy's warm-hearted patriotism to save. You murdered him." She turned to let her companion speak agin, but the power to speak had gone from her; her slender figure swayed and Arvilly caught her in her strong arms. She had fainted almost away; she could say no more.

Arvilly said if she had a long whitewash brush she would advertise her book, the "Twin Crimes," by paintin' a drunken man in a hovel beatin' his wife and children, whilst America wuz furnishin' him with the clubs, and the "Wild and Warlike Deeds of Men" in different wild and warlike attitudes. And little Tommy wonnered if he could climb up on it and wonnered what anybody could see from the top.

Sez I, "Let me in then; I can't have you there alone, Arvilly." "I hain't alone!" sez she. "Grief is here, and everlastin' shame for my country." It come to me in a minute, this wuz the anniversary of her husband's death, the day our govermunt's pardner, the licensed saloon, had murdered him down in Cuba. I sez, "May God help you, Arvilly!" And I turned onto my heel and left.

But of their talks together and Arvilly's arguments with Elder Wessel more anon and bime by. Arvilly stood up aginst the sea-sickness as she would aginst a obstinate subscriber, and finally brought the sickness to terms as she would the buyer, on the third day, and appeared pale but triumphant, with a subscription book in her hand and the words of her prospectus dribblin' from her lips.

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