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Updated: July 28, 2025
"'My brother Abe, says this yere scand'lous Vance that a-way, 'jest nacherally wins the kyarpets off Whitey Bob's floor. "Son, it's simple egreegious the way this Vance carries on in them fool rev'lations touchin' his brother Abe. "It gets so, final, that a passel of sports lodges complaints with Jenkins. 'What's the use! says them maddened sports to Jenkins.
At this he paused and surveyed me with an eye of challenge; after a bit, perceiving that I proposed no further contradiction, he went on: "This Billy Bowlaigs at first is a cub b'ar a black cub b'ar: an' when he grows up to manhood, so to speak, he's as big, an' mighty near as strong physical, as Dan Boggs. Nacherally, however, Dan lays over Bowlaigs mental like a ace-full.
'An' to mark my appreciation tharof, I'll jest nacherally take every resk of splits an' put ten thousand in the pot, coppered; ten thousand in the big squar'; an' ten thousand, coppered, on the high kyard. "Son, we-all sports standin' lookin' on draws a deep breath.
'Does mortal y'ears ever before listen to sech folly! I suppose he takes that gun I has as threats! I'm a onprotected young female, an' nacherally, when I embarks on this yere elopement, I packs one of paw's guns. Besides, this sweetheart of mine might get cold feet, an' try to jump the game, an' then I'd need said weepon to make good my p'sition. But it's never meant for that pastor!
You simply gets a gun an' goes trackin' 'round in her destinies, an' shootin' up her prospects like you has a personal interest. You don't know but she deplores the deal complete. Peets, an' me, an' Boggs, an' all the rest of us is your friends, an' nacherally partial on your side. We-alls figgers you means well.
As it stands, I blunders into them orisons inadvertent; but, havin' picked up the hand, I nacherally continues an' plays it. "'It's this a-way about them religious exercises: I'm emerged from the Tub of Blood, an' am p'intin' out for the dance-hall, when I strikes a wickeyup all lighted, an' singin' on the inside. I takes it for a joint I ain't seen none as yet, an' tharupon heads up an' enters.
Billy feels, too, that while this yere's a blow, still it's a great occasion; an' as he takes to feelin' his whiskey an' roominatin' on the tangled state of affairs, it suddenly strikes him he'll jest nacherally close up the trail by the house. "'Women is frail people an' can't abide noises that a-way, says Billy, ` an' 'Doby's shore lookin' some faded himse'f.
You remember the big storm three year ago, come grass, when the cattle all huddled up a-top o' each other and friz in one pile, solid." Bill grunted an affirmative. "Wal, sir, I was a-herdin', over at the Spencer Place, and was out on Thunderhead when the wind sprung up. Thar come one turrible vyg'rous blow that jest nacherally lifted the ground.
"'When the Mormons comes wanderin' along, bein' short on grub that a-way, they nacherally jumps in an' consooms up the whole outfit in one season, which is why you-alls don't find pickled buffalo in Salt Lake no more. "'Bridger an' me starts in, when we learns about it, to fuss with them polygamists that a-way for gettin' away with our salt buffalos.
"Jack Moore drops the loop of his lariat over the off moccasin of the deceased Mexican, an' canters his pony down the draw with him, so's we ain't offended none by the vision of him spraddled out that a-way dead. This yere's thoughtful of Jack, an' shows he's nacherally refined an' objects to remainders lyin' 'round loose.
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