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Updated: September 21, 2025
"Oh, no, Rawdon, but you always exaggerate," said Tanny. "Maybe," said Lilly. "I think Japanese are fascinating fascinating so quick, and such FORCE in them " "Rather! eh?" said Jim, looking with a quick smile at Tanny. "I think a Japanese lover would be marvellous," she laughed riskily. "I s'd think he would," said Jim, screwing up his eyes.
But I can't get much fire in my hatred. They pall on me rather," said Lilly. "Ay!" said Aaron, suddenly stirring in his chair. Lilly and he glanced at one another with a look of recognition. "Still," said Tanny, "there's got to be a clearance some day or other." "Oh," drawled Clariss. "I'm all for a clearance. I'm all for pulling the house down.
The four who were going north went down to the low tube level. It was nearly the last train. The station was half deserted, half rowdy, several fellows were drunk, shouting and crowing. Down there in the bowels of London, after midnight, everything seemed horrible and unnatural. "How I hate this London," said Tanny.
In the morning, the walk was to take place, as arranged, Lilly and Tanny accompanying Jim to the third station across country. The morning was lovely, the country beautiful. Lilly liked the countryside and enjoyed the walk. But a hardness inside himself never relaxed. Jim talked a little again about the future of the world, and a higher state of Christlikeness in man. But Lilly only laughed.
"If I really believe in an Almighty God, I am willing to sacrifice for Him. That is, I'm willing to yield my own personal interest to the bigger creative interest. But it's obvious Almighty God isn't mere Love." "I think it is. Love and only love," said Jim. "I think the greatest joy is sacrificing oneself to love." "To SOMEONE you love, you mean," said Tanny. "No I don't.
And it isn't a negative Nirvana either. And if Tanny possesses her own soul in patience and peace as well and if in this we understand each other at last then there we are, together and apart at the same time, and free of each other, and eternally inseparable. I have my Nirvana and I have it all to myself. But more than that. It coincides with her Nirvana." "Ah, yes," said Aaron.
Like to see the ball kept rolling." "What have you been doing lately?" "Been staying a few days with my wife." "No, really! I can't believe it." Jim had a French wife, who had divorced him, and two children. Now he was paying visits to this wife again: purely friendly. Tanny did most of the talking.
I never have lived alone. Tanny and I have been very much alone in various countries: but that's two, not one." "You miss her then?" "Yes, of course. I missed her horribly in the cottage, when she'd first gone. I felt my heart was broken. But here, where we've never been together, I don't notice it so much." "She'll come back," said Aaron. "Yes, she'll come back.
It was broken by a sudden laugh from Tanny. "The things that happen to us!" she said, laughing rather shrilly. "Suddenly, like a thunderbolt, we're all struck into silence!" "Rum game, eh!" said Jim, grinning. "Isn't it funny! Isn't life too funny!" She looked again at her husband. "But, Rawdy, you must admit it was your own fault." Lilly's stiff face did not change.
After tea, as the evening fell, Lilly suggested a little stroll in the woods, while Tanny prepared the dinner. Jim agreed, and they set out. The two men wandered through the trees in the dusk, till they came to a bank on the farther edge of the wood. There they sat down. And there Lilly said what he had to say.
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