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Updated: May 12, 2025
And so it went on till finally in the fullness of time Josiah produced a dockument which he said wuz the finest plan ever drawed up in America. Sez he, "I have at last reached perfection." "I spoze you'll let me see it now it is finished," I sez.
But it is a sight, I spoze, to see all the performances they had to go through, the hard labor of years and years, to persuade Niagara to do what they had planned for it to do. But as I say, this great giant is chained by one foot, as it were, and is doin' good day's works, and no knowin' how much more will be put on it to do when the rest of its strength is buckled down to work.
He wuz nearly delirious I spoze he wuz nearly overcome by my remarkable eloquence, but don't know.
I spoze it will be a great disappointment to him when he hears on't that Josiah and I had really been there right to his home and he shouldn't be there. I well know how bad I should feel if Potentates come to Jonesville and I happened to be off on a tower.
Then come the hired mourners wimmen for I spoze they think they're used to mournin' and can earn their money better. 'Tennyrate, these screeched and wailed and tore their hair and beat their breast-bone as if they meant to earn their money. Then come the relatives and friends. Of course, they no need to have wep' a tear, havin' hired it done.
She said she believed her husband drinked and got led off into all sorts of sins and made Celia no end of trouble and riz this monument up to smooth things over. But I sez, "Mebby things wuz different then;" but didn't really spoze so, human nater havin' capered about the same from the start.
Robert Strong liked and respected her, I spoze mebby on Dorothy's account, and Tommy adored her; why, even Josiah felt towards her, he said, some as if she wuz Tirzah Ann growed young agin. Arvilly's heart she won completely by makin' her a bag to carry the "Twin Crimes" in.
You say a man dug this plate up; what if some woman should go to diggin' and find a plate provin' that one woman ort to have 'leven husbands?" "Oh, no!" sez the man in deep scorn, "no such plate could be found!" The wimmen all looked as if they would kinder like to see such dishes, but they all sez faintly, "We don't spoze that it could be found."
"Oh, keep throwin' that meetin' house in my face, I should think you'd git tired ont but don't spoze you will." And Blandina sez, "Oh, Aunt Samantha, don't be too harsh on them happy young men, it is only their high sperits. They would probable settle down and make the best of husbands if they had a tender and loving companion.
I do spoze it wuz vanity and pride that wuz at the bottom of it. And truly, if I desired to see life on a new side I wuz about to have my wish; and if I had a haughty sperit when I entered that hall of fashion, it wuz with droopin' feathers and lowered crest that I went out on't. Josiah wuz mad when he finally gin up and accompanied and went in with me.
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