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Updated: June 14, 2025
"But, mein herr, dogs are not permitted to be in the castle." "Who is she? How did she get there?" "Heaven defend us, sir! It must have been the ghost of " "Ghost, your granny!" I cried, relapsing into English. "Please don't beat about the bush, Mr. Schmick. She's over there in the unused wing, which I haven't been allowed to penetrate in spite of the fact that it belongs to me.
His sons towered and glowered and his wife wrapped and unwrapped her hands in her apron, all the time supplicating heaven to be good to the true and the faithful. From what I could gather, they all seemed to be more disturbed over the fact that my hallucination included a dog than by the claim that I had seen a woman. "But, confound you, Schmick," I cried in some heat, "it barked at me."
After the very worst meal that Frau Schmick had ever cooked, and the last one that Max under any circumstance would be permitted to serve, I took myself off once more to the enchanted balcony. I was full of the fever of romance.
One octogenarian a carpenter's apprentice heatedly informed me, through Schmick, that he had a child two weeks old that would die before morning if deprived of proper food and nourishment. Somewhat impressed by this pitiful lament, I enquired how his wife was getting along.
Vastly exercised, I set out in quest of Herr Schmick, martialing Poopendyke as I went along, realising that I would have to depend on his German, which was less halting than mine and therefore, more likely to dovetail with that of the Schmicks, neither of whom spoke German because they loved it but because they had to, being Austrians.
"Herr Schmick," said I, "will you be so good as to inform me who the dickens that woman is over in the east wing of the castle?" "Woman, mein herr?" He almost dropped his keys. His big sons said something to each other that I couldn't quite catch, but it sounded very much like "der duyvil." "A woman in a white dress, with a dog." "A dog?" he cried.
But as it turned out in this case I not only failed to split the panel but broke off the sledge handle near the head, putting it wholly out of commission for the time being as well as stinging my hands so severely that I doubled up with pain and shouted words that Dame Schmick could not put into her prayers. The Schmicks fairly glowed with joy!
"Tell 'em we've got to go to work ourselves." "By the way, old man Schmick and his family haven't been paid for nearly two years. They have put in a claim. The late owner assured them they'd get their money from the next " "Discharge them at once," said I. "We can't get on without them," protested he. "They know the ropes, so to speak, and, what's more to the point, they know all the keys.
My own man is much the same sort of a chap. He also is married." Did I imagine that he chuckled? Half an hour later when I rejoined my guests after a session with Conrad Schmick, I was somewhat annoyed by the dig George Hazzard planted in my devoted ribs, and the furtive wink he gave me.
"Please send Herr Schmick to me in the in the " I couldn't recall the name of the administration chamber at the head of the grand staircase, so I was compelled to say: "I'll see him here." "If we lose them we also are lost," was his sententious declaration. I believed him.
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