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Updated: June 1, 2025


Burlingame, y'r anner, the minute I first saw him, sez I, 'Askatoon's no safe place for me. Whin wan like that gits a footin' in a place, the locks can't be too manny to shut ye in whin ye want to sleep at night. That fella's got no pedigree, and if it wouldn't hurt some dacent woman, maybe, I'd say he was misbegotten.

If ye want the truth, y'r anner, them two young people have had words together and plenty of them, whether it's across the hall her room from his; or in his room; or through the windy or down the chimney-shure, I don't care! They've spoke. There's that between them wants watchin'. Not that there's wrong in aither of them divil a bit! I've got me own mind about Mr. Orlando Giggles.

"Divils me own, it isn't what he's done; it's his bein' here. It's his bein' what he is. It doesn't need doin' to bring wild youth together. Look at her, y'r anner! A week ago she was like wan that 'd be called to the Land of Canaan anny minnit. Wasn't you here tendin' her, as if she was steppin' intil her grave, an' look at her now! She's like a rose in the garden, like a lark's lilt in the air.

"Sure, what would I do or say in the face av His 'Anner an' the joorymin, with niver a word on the tongue av me?"

Den he ma she powerful took back dat li'l' black Mose he gwine be so uppetish an' contrydict folks whut know 'rifmeticks an' algebricks an' gin'ral countin' widout fingers, like de school-teacher whut board at Unc' Silas Diggs's house knows, an' she say': "Huh! whut you know 'bout ghosts, anner ways?"

There niver had been a girl in his life, and there niver was a man in hers not one that mattered, till they two took up with each other, and it's a thing well, y'r anner, I'd be a proud man if I could write it down. It's a story that'd take its place beside the ancient ones." The Young Doctor looked at Patsy meditatively.

If ye want the truth, y'r anner, them two young people have had words together and plenty of them, whether it's across the hall her room from his; or in his room; or through the windy or down the chimney-shure, I don't care! They've spoke. There's that between them wants watchin'. Not that there's wrong in aither of them divil a bit! I've got me own mind about Mr. Orlando Giggles.

Indade, an' it's mighty poor form it is, if ye ask my opinion, which ye don't, an' it's mighty poor manners." At this point the judge interposed. "Come, come," he said, "what is your name? I suppose you are not ashamed of it?" "Ashamed av it, Yer 'Anner!" said Mrs. Fitzpatrick, with an elaborate bow to the judge, "ashamed av it! There's niver a shame goes with the name av Fitzpatrick!"

They looked, and looked, as though they was tryin' to read some story in each other's eyes, and then she give a kind of joyful moan, and intil his arms she went like a nestlin' bird. "He raised up her head, and-well, now, y'r anner, I niver saw anything I liked better.

"An' sure, yer anner, if Oi arn't broad enough in the chist, I make up for it by being taller for me age Bedad, Oi'm that, sor!" The doctor seemed tickled by this unanswerable piece of logic. "We'll see about that, Paddy," he said. "Trimmens, measure his height!" "Five feet five, sir," ejaculated the steward, after adjusting the sliding roll of the standard and reading the index.

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