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Updated: June 19, 2025
Many times in the course of a career which brought him much fighting and some little fame, Dicky Vyell remembered this his first lesson in courage that if you walk straight up to an enemy, as likely as not you find him vanished. But he had not quite reached the end of his alarms. As he took the cage, a parrot at the back of the booth uplifted his voice and squawked, "No prerogative!
What would they have a carrot for?" protested the Babe. Uncle Andy scorned to notice this remark. "When Young Grumpy approached the coop," he continued, "the red hen squawked frantically, and the chickens all ran in under her wings. Young Grumpy eyed her with curiosity for a moment, as she screamed at him with open beak and ruffled up all her feathers.
Rivers has a gunsmith over at Kingsville, one Elmer Umholtz, who does all his fraudulent conversions for him. I have an example of Umholtz's craftsmanship, myself. The collector who bought this spurious flintlock spotted what had been done, and squawked to the Rifle Association, and to the postal authorities."
Then he ruffled his neck feathers, flapped his wings, and crowed so loudly that Pancho and Doña Teresa and the Twins all woke at once and sat up with a bounce, to see what was the matter. It startled the little white hen to see them all sit up suddenly in a row, so she squawked and scrambled out through the open door as fast as she could go.
They were all very fine birds; some had blue heads and yellow bodies and green tails; others had red heads and yellow tails; there were one or two who were quite white, but they each one thought that he was a very fine fellow, and they all shouted and screamed and squawked at the top of their voices. And what was it all about?
Henrietta Hen squawked. She made so much noise that some of her neighbors came a-running, to see what was the matter. And as soon as they discovered what had happened they began to laugh. "We may as well tell you," they said to Henrietta Hen, "that that chap out there is a duckling. The water won't hurt him." Henrietta Hen gasped and gaped. She was astonished. But she soon pulled herself together.
"I vos a deadt man!" squawked the Dutch lad, as he went over in a heap. "I'm shot, by gum!" squealed the Yankee, as his knees collapsed and he measured his long length upon the ground. "Smoke!" cried Barney Mulloy, grasping his nose with both hands. "It smells loike ye'd both been corpuses fer a long toime!" "By Jove!" gasped Frank. "That odor is strong enough to lift a safe!"
"Twenty-six," squawked the unsuspecting Punch in surprise, while the audience roared appreciatively. "Did I kill so many? Hello, who are you?" "I," came the preternaturally deep voice as Louise quaked at the make-belief reality of the scene, "am the devil!" "Now they'll fight," breathed John, watching intently.
This tumult caused the major to arouse with a sudden little jump of amazement and apprehension. He rubbed his eyes and gazed about him. Meanwhile, some clever chicken had discovered a passage to safety and led the flock into the garden, where they squawked in sustained alarm.
"Cut-cut-cut," she squawked. "Cut-cut yourself now!" cried Grannie Malone. She ran toward the door, waving her spoon. "Shoo along out of this with your bad manners!" she cried. Just that minute Larry came up behind the hen and tried to catch her by the legs. "Cut-cut-cut-a-cut," squawked old Speckle; and up she flew, right over Grannie's head, into the rafters!
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