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Clopper confided to the company his wish that I should marry his sister, and vowed that he thought me the best fellow in Christendom. Ensign Dobble assented to this. "But let Miss Clopper beware," says he, "for Stubbs is a sad fellow: he has had I don't know how many liaisons already; and he has been engaged to I don't know how many women." "Indeed!" says Clopper.
Calm in the perusal of the morning papers, uncompromising in the signature of his name, dignified in his replies to the inquiries of stranger applicants, deferential in his behaviour to his superiors, majestic in his deportment to the messengers. Dobble? Is it requisite for him to expatiate on the qualities of that amiable woman?
Dobble was obliged to take the hint; and Captain Stubbs was duly presented to Mrs. Manasseh. The lady was as gracious as possible; and when, at the end of the walk, we parted, she said "she hoped Captain Dobble would bring me to her apartments that evening, where she expected a few friends."
The dear girls fell in love with us, of course. One day, fancy our pleasure at receiving a note couched thus: "DEER CAPTING STUBBS AND DOBBLE Miss Briskets presents their compliments, and as it is probble that our papa will be till twelve at the corprayshun dinner, we request the pleasure of their company to tea." Didn't we go!
Dobble raised me up; and taking the card from my neck, read, CAPTAIN WATERS. Clopper poured me out a glass of water, and said in my ear, "If this is true, you are an infernal scoundrel, Stubbs; and must fight me, after Captain Waters;" and he flounced out of the room. I had but one course to pursue. I sent the Captain a short and contemptuous note, saying that he was beneath my anger.
There's no use to give one's self out to be an absolute pauper: so the fact is, that I myself went everywhere with the character of a man of very large means. My father had died, leaving me immense sums of money, and landed estates. Ah! I was the gentleman then, the real gentleman, and everybody was too happy to have me at table. Well, I came the next day, and left a card for Dobble, with a note.
Fancy, then, our horror when, just at this critical time, we heard the shop-door open, a heavy staggering step on the flags, and a loud husky voice from the shop, shouting, "Hallo, Susan; hallo, Betsy! show a light!" Dobble turned as white as a sheet; the two girls each as red as a lobster; I alone preserved my presence of mind. "The back-door," says I "The dog's in the court," say they.
"That's it," says Brisket. "Keep him there, good dog, good dog! And now, sir," says he, turning round to Dobble, "is this your hat?" "Yes," says Dobble, fit to choke with fright. Dobble went down on his knees and shrieked out, "I'm an only son, Mr. Brisket! I'll marry her, sir; I will, upon my honor, sir. Consider my mother, sir; consider my mother." I'll chop the other CHAP AFTERWARDS."
"Hush, Dobble, hush! don't you see one of those naval officers has turned round and heard you? My dear Clopper, it was a mere childish bagatelle." "Well, but let's have it," said Clopper "let's have it. I won't tell my sister, you know." And he put his hand to his nose and looked monstrous wise.
I was obliged to repel some rather warm advances that she made me; and here, upon my honor as a gentleman, you have all the story about which that silly Dobble makes such a noise. Just as I finished this sentence. I found myself suddenly taken by the nose, and a voice shouting out, "Mr.
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