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Updated: August 13, 2024
This was the reason, in Bouvard's opinion, that there were so many frauds at presidential elections. "None," replied Bouvard; "I believe rather in the gullibility of the people. Think of all who buy the patent health-restorer, the Dupuytren pomatum, the Châtelaine's water, etc. Those boobies constitute the majority of the electorate, and we submit to their will.
They grasped the working of straw, gold, silver, the lye-washing of linen, the tinning of saucepans; then, without the least scruple, Bouvard and Pécuchet launched into organic chemistry. What a marvel to find again in living beings the same substances of which the minerals are composed!
But of this people, who ruled the ancient world, there remain only stones either isolated or in groups of three, or placed together so as to resemble a rude chamber, or forming enclosures. Bouvard and Pécuchet, filled with enthusiasm, studied in succession the stone on the Post-farm at Ussy, the Coupled Stone at Quest, the Standing Stone near L'Aigle, and others besides.
Another side of the court-yard contained the apartments of the castellan, Jean Bouvard, a sturdy soldier of long experience, and those of the other officers of the household; the other two sides were occupied by the chapel, the kitchens, and the offices of the servants and retainers. All these rooms were loopholed on the side looking into the outer court.
The skeleton astonished them by the prominence of the jawbone, the holes for the eyes, and the frightful length of the hands. They stood in need of an explanatory work. The metacarpals drove Bouvard crazy; and Pécuchet, who was in a desperate state over the cranium, lost courage before the sphenoid, although it resembles a Turkish or "Turkesque" saddle.
It was in the midst of this occupation that Madame Bordin accosted him one day on the high-road. When she had complimented him, she inquired about his friend. He replied curtly, and turned his back on her an impoliteness of which Bouvard disapproved. Then the bad weather came on, with frost and snow.
They strove to interpret the sculptured symbols on the capitals, such as the two griffins of Marigny pecking at a tree in blossom; Pécuchet read a satire in the singers with grotesque jaws which terminate the mouldings at Feugerolles; and as for the exuberance of the man that covers one of the mullions at Hérouville, that was a proof, according to Bouvard, of our ancestors' love of broad jokes.
Madame Bordin made this observation: "All the same, it must have cost you a good deal?" "Oh! not too much, not too much." A slater had given it to him for fifteen francs. After this, she found fault on the score of propriety with the low dress of the lady in the powdered wig. "Where is the harm," replied Bouvard, "when one possesses something beautiful?"
"What does it matter?" said Pécuchet; "it is time to cease stagnating in selfishness. Let us look out for the best system." "Then you expect to find it?" "Certainly." "You?" And, in the fit of laughter with which Bouvard was seized, his shoulders and stomach kept shaking in harmony.
The widow replied in an affected manner: "The demands of M. Bouvard would be too high." "Perhaps someone could soften him." "I will not try." "Bah! if you embraced him?" "Let us try, all the same," said Bouvard. And he kissed her on both cheeks, amid the plaudits of the guests.
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