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Updated: May 27, 2025
He threw it down upon the table a time or two, and its mobile articulation caused it to assume grotesque attitudes, whereupon Trimalchio chimed in: "Poor man is nothing in the scheme of things And Orcus grips us and to Hades flings Our bones! This skeleton before us here Is as important as we ever were! Let's live then while we may and life is dear."
Poetical insertions are very frequent, some original, others quoted, many of considerable elegance. From its central and by many degrees most entertaining incident the whole satire has been called The Supper of Trimalchio. We have a few short passages remaining from the lost books, and some allusions in these we possess enable us to reconstruct to some extent their argument.
While they thus entertained one another, we went into the hot-house that had been heated for Trimalchio; and being now recovered of our drunkenness, were brought into another room, where Fortunata had set out a fresh entertainment. Above the lamps I observed some women's gewgaws.
And here our mirth first began to be disturb'd; for a beautiful boy coming in among those new servants, Trimalchio plucked the boy to him, and did nothing but kiss him over and over: Whereupon Fortunata to maintain her right, began to rail at Trimalchio, called him pitiful fellow, one that could not bridle his lust, shame and dishonour to an honest woman, and a very dog.
Every now and then Trimalchio would repeat "Carver, Carver," in a low voice, until I finally came to the conclusion that some joke was meant in repeating a word so frequently, so I did not scruple to question him who reclined above me. As he had often experienced byplay of this sort he explained, "You see that fellow who is carving the meat, don't you? Well, his name is Carver.
Trimalchio laughed. "There's where the Cappadocian comes out," he said; "never cheats himself out of anything and I admire him for it, so help me Hercules, I do. No one can show a dead man a good time. Don't be jealous, Scintilla; we're next to you women, too, believe me.
In this sad pickle, what should we do? we found ourselves in a new kind of labyrinth, and for bathing, we'd enough of it already: However, necessity enforcing us, we pray'd him to show us the way to the bath: and Gito having hung out our cloaths a drying in the porch, we entred the bath, which was somewhat narrow, and sunk in the earth, not unlike a rainwater cistern; in this stood Trimalchio stark-naked: Nor could we avoid his filthy tricks; for he said, nothing was better than to bathe in a crowd; and that every place had in times past been a grinding-house.
Just at this point Trimalchio suddenly turns sentimental, and, after giving elaborate directions for his own obsequies, begins to cry. The whole company are in tears round him when he suddenly rallies, and proposes that, as death is certain, they shall all go and have a hot bath. In the little confusion that follows, the narrator and his friend slip quietly away.
While we were marveling at this display of refinement, Menelaus rushed up, "He is the one with whom you will rest upon your elbow," he panted, "what you see now, is only a prelude to the dinner." Menelaus had scarcely ceased speaking when Trimalchio snapped his fingers; the eunuch, hearing the signal, held the chamber-pot for him while he still continued playing.
Trimalchio observed it, and commanding all to be laid before him, "See," said he, "this womans finery, and what fools our wives make us; they should be six pound and a half; yet I've another of Mercury's making, that weighs ten": And that he might not be thought to tell a lye, called for his gold scales, and commanded them to be weighed: Nor had Scintilla more wit than t'other, for pulling a golden box out of her bosom, which she called good luck, she took out of it two large pearl pendants, giving them in like manner to Fortunata to view: "See," quoth she, "what 'tis to have a kind husband, I am sure no woman has better."
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