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Updated: May 13, 2025


Now how is it possible that a Physician can with any certainty make use of several Shops, since there is so great difference in the ingredients? and 'tis certain the same Medicine made by several Apothecaries, shall differ much in colour, smell, and tast, and consequently effect too; which cannot proceed from any other cause then the difference of the ingredients themselves, or by omitting some ingredients, or by substituting one thing for another; or by distinct ways of preparing them.

The chronicler records among the men of note of James's time Sir Francis Vere, "who as another Hannibal, with his one eye, could see more in the Martial Discipline than common men can do with two"; Sir Edward Coke; Sir Francis Bacon, "who besides his profounder book, of Novum Organum, hath written the reign of King Henry the Seventh, in so sweet a style, that like Manna, it pleaseth the tast of all palats"; William Camden, whose Description of Britain "seems to keep Queen Elizabeth alive after death"; "and to speak it in a word, the Trojan Horse was not fuller of Heroick Grecians, than King James his Reign was full of men excellent in all kindes of Learning."

But really friends, if you come to tast the Brides tears now, 'tis a great while too soon: But if you'l have of the right and unfeigned ones, you must come some months hence.

Some sauce may be added to vary the tast; for no flesh pleases alone, but is prepar'd by art to commend it to the stomach. If you desire instances of this kind, to make ye approve my advice; the Saguntines when they were besieg'd by Hannibal eat humane bodies, without the hopes of an estate for doing it.

The chronicler records among the men of note of James's time Sir Francis Vere, "who as another Hannibal, with his one eye, could see more in the Martial Discipline than common men can do with two"; Sir Edward Coke; Sir Francis Bacon, "who besides his profounder book, of Novum Organum, hath written the reign of King Henry the Seventh, in so sweet a style, that like Manna, it pleaseth the tast of all palats"; William Camden, whose Description of Britain "seems to keep Queen Elizabeth alive after death"; "and to speak it in a word, the Trojan Horse was not fuller of Heroick Grecians, than King James his Reign was full of men excellent in all kindes of Learning."

Amongst whom there was one, which in my opinion, was sent from Heaven to save my life, that willed the other to set a bason of faire water before me, and thereby they would know whether I were mad or no, for if I did drinke without feare as I accustomed to do, it was a signe that I was whole, and in mine Assie wits, where contrary if I did flie and abhorre the tast of the water, it was evident proofe of my madness, which thing he said that he had read in ancient and credible books, whereupon they tooke a bason of cleere water, and presented it before me: but I as soone as I perceived the wholesome water of my life, ran incontinently, thrusting my head into the bason, drank as though I had beene greatly athirst; then they stroked me with their hands, and bowed mine eares, and tooke me by the halter, to prove my patience, but I taking each thing in good part, disproved their mad presumption, by my meeke and gentle behaviour: when I was thus delivered from this double danger, the next day I was laded againe with the goddesse Siria, and other trumpery, and was brought into the way with Trumpets and Cymbals to beg in the villages which we passed by according to our custome.

A third Universal Medicine was Hughes's Powder, sold by him at 10 s. the Grain, and 3 l. 10 s. the Dose, made doubtless of Gold and Quicksilver. The tast and weight of it manifestly discover the former to be an ingredient into it, and the effect, viz. Salivation proves the latter to be part of the compound. Now these three Notorious Universal Medicines were put to sale by most ignorant persons.

And thereupon went to a Chymist, and bought as much of the said Spirit, as would make up the quantity purchased of Dr. Goddard, who after Tryal of it by smell, and tast, acknowledged it to be his, and honestly payed back the sum 'twas first sold for; which I think few of the Mountebanks do.

And here as well as in other Cases, the Patient is to be rectified, who requires the Physicians Visits, and yet dismisseth him without a reward, unless he writes a Bill, whereas it might have been better if nothing at all had been prescribed; and the Physician left to his own judgment; and hence it is that many enlarge their Bills, that the Patient may think he hath enough for his money, whereby the Apothecary is gratified, who ought to commend the Medicines as necessary for the sick person, and singular in themselves, whereas in truth this great farcy proves ungrateful to the tast and stomach; inconvenient to health, by curing one disease, but creating more; and by this means keeping them continually in a way of Physic.

And although of nature he could well absteine from sléepe, yet to be the better able to forbeare it, he vsed a maruellous spare kind of diet: for to the end that he would not fill himselfe too much with bread, he would eat none but such as was brought to him from Rome, so that more than necessitie compelled him he could not eat, by reason that the stalenesse tooke awaie the pleasant tast thereof, and lesse prouoked his appetite.

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