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Updated: June 6, 2025
'Even if I had any firm conviction, how could I be useful? even if I had faith in my own powers, where is one to find true, sympathetic souls? And Rudin waved his hand so hopelessly, and let his head sink so gloomily, that Natalya involuntarily asked herself, were those really his those enthusiastic words full of the breath of hope, she had heard the evening before.
Hardly less remarkable is the character of the heroine, Natalya, the quiet, sober, matter-of-fact girl, who at the bottom is an enthusiastic and heroic nature. She is but a child fresh to all impressions of life, and as yet undeveloped. To have used the searching, analytical method in painting her would have spoiled this beautiful creation.
When her Fanny did at last marry, Natalya as everybody called the old clo'-woman was not over-pleased at the bargain. Natalya had imagined beforehand that for a matronly daughter of twenty-three, almost past the marrying age, any wedding would be a profitable transaction. But when a husband actually presented himself, all the old dealer's critical maternity was set a-bristle.
"Miss Violet Pike came forward then," said Natalya, "and said, 'Cannot this sentence be mollified? "And he said it could not be mollified. "They took us away in a patrol to the Tombs. "We waited in the waiting-room there. The matron looked at us and said, 'You are not bad girls. I will not send you down to the cells. You can do some sewing for me here. But I could not sew.
The first disillusionment is painful for every one; but for a sincere heart, averse to self-deception and innocent of frivolity or exaggeration, it is almost unendurable. Natalya remembered her childhood, how, when walking in the evening, she always tried to go in the direction of the setting sun, where there was light in the sky, and not toward the darkened half of the heavens.
But Natalya made her escape, and was gone. Rudin stood still a little while, then walked slowly out of the arbour. The moon threw a light on his face; there was a smile on his lips. 'I am happy, he uttered in a half whisper. 'Yes, I am happy, he repeated, as though he wanted to convince himself.
I read a history of the Crusades, said Natalya, with some hesitation. Volintsev looked at her. 'Ah! he ejaculated at last, 'that must be interesting. He picked a twig and began to twirl it in the air. They walked another twenty paces. 'What is this baron whom your mother has made acquaintance with? began Volintsev again.
He declared that there was no noble idea which would not gain sympathy, that the only people who remained misunderstood were those who either did not know themselves what they wanted, or were not worthy to be understood. He spoke at length, and ended by once more thanking Natalya Alexyevna, and utterly unexpectedly pressed her hand, exclaiming. 'You are a noble, generous creature!
'You should not say that, Natalya Alexyevna; your playing is not at all inferior to mine. 'Do you know Schubert's "Erlkonig"? asked Rudin. 'He knows it, he knows it! interposed Darya Mihailovna. 'Sit down, Konstantin. You are fond of music, Dmitri Nikolaitch? Rudin only made a slight motion of the head and ran his hand through his hair, as though disposing himself to listen.
"Why do you skip on the staircase? You may hurt yourself. And you had better eat more, eat for two, that he may have enough." And the pregnancy made Natalya more morose and silent, as though she were looking still deeper into herself, absorbed in the throbbing of new life within her.
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