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Updated: June 20, 2025
So long as this iniquitous practice is persisted in, and the equally hurtful one of swallowing large quantities of liquids with the meals, and so long as sufficient time is not given the food to digest, just so long will you suffer from a disordered stomach. Speaking generally, Americans are a nation of dyspeptics, because they are perpetually in a hurry.
Knead, roll very thin, and bake quickly in a hot oven. Excellent food for dyspeptics. APPLE SNOW. Take seven apples, not very sweet ones, and bake till soft and brown. Then remove the skins and cores; when cool, beat them smooth and fine; add one-half cup of granulated sugar and the white of one egg. Beat till the mixture will hold on your spoon. Serve with soft custard.
That in civilized communities dyspepsia is a very common disease. 2d. That dyspeptics require rest of mind and body to facilitate the laborious process of digestion. Cæteris paribus, these same propositions may be held of those suffering from abnormal modes of activity in another part of the ganglionic system that connected with menstruation.
Burn the enclosed MS., the erudition and archaisms of which would fatally nauseate the intellectual dyspeptics who read my 'Maga, and write sketches of home life-descriptions of places and things that you understand better than recondite analogies of ethical creeds and mythologic systems, or the subtle lore of Coptic priests.
But I do say this: unless a man can talk of his trouble as cleverly as Carlyle and some of the choice dyspeptics I know can almost do that I want them not to talk at all. If they suffer, let them do it in silence. If they die, let them die entertainingly, or else, I say, don't die in public.
I dare say I know plenty of women dyspeptics, as long as dyspepsia is said to be our national ailment, but if I do I never hear them talk about it. Of course every woman knows that a sick man is sicker than a thousand sick women, each of whom is twice as sick as he is.
You have only to look about you to know the truth of the situation, which is, that the person with the least digestion is the one who always does the most for it, and that those who eat the most have the least trouble. Where do you find the percentage of dyspeptics running highest, in the country or the city? Where do you find the stout woman who is banting as she pants and panting as she bants?
You know what the facts of life are, Mrs. Moncreiff. Young as you are you are older than me in some respects, though I have a long life before me. It's just because I have a long life before me dyspeptics are always long-lived that I'm afraid for the future. It wouldn't matter so much if I was an old man."
With this ideal method of marriage in force, the dyspeptics could go off by themselves until they felt better, and not be bothered with tender inquiries concerning their health. If the latch key unaccountably refused to work at two o'clock in the morning, some other member of the husband could always assist the absent ones in, and Madam would never know how many were late.
There are bills of fare for dyspeptics; bills of fare for consumptives; bills of fare for fat people, and bills of fare for thin; and bills of fare for hospitals, asylums, and prisons, as well as for gentlemen's houses. But among them all, we never saw the one which we give below. It has never been printed in any book; but it has been used in families.
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