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Perhaps such an act would horrify her, if she were with you, but it is quite different where I am concerned. She looks on me as vermin. Her affair with Keller was simply to make a laughing-stock of me. You don't know what a fool she made of me in Moscow; and the money I spent over her! The money! the money!" "And you can marry her now, Parfen!
"Ye-yes!" replied Rogojin, starting at the unexpected question. "Soon?" "You know yourself it does not depend on me." "Parfen, I am not your enemy, and I do not intend to oppose your intentions in any way. I repeat this to you now just as I said it to you once before on a very similar occasion.
We went straight into her drawing-room, and then she came out to us. "I didn't say right out who I was, but Zaleshoff said: 'From Parfen Rogojin, in memory of his first meeting with you yesterday; be so kind as to accept these! "She opened the parcel, looked at the earrings, and laughed. "'Thank your friend Mr. Rogojin for his kind attention, says she, and bowed and went off.
'Let's all go to the theatre, she says, 'and leave him here if he won't go it's not my business. They'll give you some tea, Parfen Semeonovitch, while I am away, for you must be hungry. She came back from the theatre alone. 'Those cowards wouldn't come, she said. 'They are afraid of you, and tried to frighten me, too.
"So should I, in your place, I've no doubt!" laughed the prince to Ferdishenko; then continued, addressing Nastasia: "Your portrait struck me very forcibly this morning; then I was talking about you to the Epanchins; and then, in the train, before I reached Petersburg, Parfen Rogojin told me a good deal about you; and at the very moment that I opened the door to you I happened to be thinking of you, when there you stood before me!"
'There, she says, 'take your earrings, you wretched old miser; although they are ten times dearer than their value to me now that I know what it must have cost Parfen to get them! Give Parfen my compliments, she says, 'and thank him very much! Well, I meanwhile had borrowed twenty-five roubles from a friend, and off I went to Pskoff to my aunt's.
"Wait a minute, I want to ask you something else, Parfen; all sorts of things; but tell me first, did you intend to kill her before my wedding, at the church door, with your knife?" "I don't know whether I did or not," said Rogojin, drily, seeming to be a little astonished at the question, and not quite taking it in. "Did you never take your knife to Pavlofsk with you?" "No.
'I will marry you, Parfen Semeonovitch, she says, not because I'm frightened of you, but because it's all the same to me how I ruin myself. And how can I do it better? Sit down; they'll bring you some dinner directly.
The servant who opened the door to Muishkin led him, without taking his name, through several rooms and up and down many steps until they arrived at a door, where he knocked. Parfen Rogojin opened the door himself. On seeing the prince he became deadly white, and apparently fixed to the ground, so that he was more like a marble statue than a human being.
Compassion is the chief law of human existence. Oh, how guilty he felt towards Rogojin! And, for a few warm, hasty words spoken in Moscow, Parfen had called him "brother," while he but no, this was delirium! It would all come right! That gloomy Parfen had implied that his faith was waning; he must suffer dreadfully.
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