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Updated: July 10, 2025
"Well, Abe, maybe you think that's a joke you should keep me here a couple of hours already," Morris said. "Many a time I got to say that to you already, Mawruss," Abe rejoined. "But, anyhow, I didn't eat it so much, Mawruss. It was Hymie Kotzen what keeps me." "Hymie Kotzen!" Morris cried. "What for should he keep you, Abe? Blows you to some tchampanyer wine, maybe?"
"I'll tell you the truth, Hymie," Abe replied, "I ain't got no time to be sick. It ain't half-past three yet, and I guess I'll take a couple of them garments and see what I can do with the jobbing and retail trade in this here town." "Don't you think you'd better take it easy for a while, Abe?" Hyman suggested. "I am taking it easy," said Abe.
Hymie stopped short. "I ain't acting, Mawruss," he said. "It's you what's acting. All I want it is you should give me my ring and pin, and I am satisfied to pay you the thousand dollars." They returned to the show-room and once more sat down. "I'll tell you the truth, Hymie," Morris said at last. "I loaned them diamonds to somebody, and that's the way it is." "You loaned 'em to somebody!"
"Well, Abe," Hyman said, "how do you like the auction business so far as you gone yet?" "It's a good, live business, Hymie," Abe replied; "but, the way it works out, it ain't always on the square.
Two weeks sped quickly by, during which Morris safeguarded the diamonds with the utmost zest and enjoyment, and at length the settling day arrived. Morris was superintending the unpacking of piece goods in the cutting-room when Abe darted upstairs. "Mawruss," he hissed, "Hymie Kotzen is downstairs."
Morris shook his head. "I wish they was," he croaked. "You wish they was!" Abe repeated in accents of amazement. "What d'ye mean?" "Somebody pinched 'em on me," Morris replied. "What!" Abe shouted. "S-sh," Morris hissed as the door opened. It was Hymie Kotzen who entered. "Well, boys," he cried, "every cloud is silver-plated. Ain't it?
"Now give me a check for fifty dollars for my fees, five dollars for a surety company bond, and five dollars sheriff's fees, and I'll get out a replevin order on the strength of that affidavit in half an hour, and have a deputy around to the store at three o'clock to transfer the goods from Hymie to you." "Sixty dollars is pretty high for a little thing like that, ain't it, Max?" said Hymie.
Morris demanded. "Come inside and speak to him, Mawruss," Abe rejoined. "He won't eat you." "Maybe you think I'm scared to turn him down, Abe?" Morris concluded as he led the way to the show-room. "Well, I'll show you different." "Hallo, Mawruss," Hymie cried. "What's the good word?" Morris grunted an inarticulate greeting. "What you got all the shades down for, Abe?" he asked.
"Don't touch 'em," Hymie said. "Just you have a look at this sample-table first." Hymie seized Morris by the arm and turned him around until he faced the velveteen. "Ain't them peaches, Mawruss?" he asked. Morris stared at the diamonds, almost hypnotized by their brilliancy.
No, Abe, I heard it enough about Hymie Kotzen already. I wouldn't positively not lend him nothing, Abe, and that's flat." To end the discussion effectually he went to the cutting-room upstairs and remained there when Hymie rang up. "It ain't no use, Hymie," Abe said. "Mawruss wouldn't think of it. We're short ourselves. You've no idee what trouble we got it with some of our collections."
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