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Updated: June 22, 2025
But I am very glad that you think my good opinion of any value to Biffen's, for I should dearly like to see our house top of the school this year, and how can it be when one, who ought to be in the House Eleven, gives up all his time to writing 'poetry' instead of playing cricket?
He simmered over many plans for getting "even" with him, and when he had finally mapped out a course he proceeded, as some one says, "diligently to ensue it;" for Acton was not of that kind to be "awkward" as occasion arose, but there was method in all his schemes. It so happened that Worcester was captain of Biffen's house, and also of Biffen's "footer" team.
Miss Hilda Elsie Varley, being Biffen's niece, had taken the house under her protection, was more rabidly Biffenite than even Rogers, adored Acton, reverenced Worcester, and appreciated Chalmers, but despised fags who weren't "training-on" for one of her houses' various elevens. Her sentiments on these matters were mysteriously but accurately known amongst Biffenite juniors.
"That bit is side," said the chairman, judicially. "Those who are in favour of Sharpe doing the poetry hold Carried, nem. con." "Nem. con. is side too, Grim," said Rogers. "Shut up, you mule! Sharpe, you'll have to do the poem." "I say, you fellows, it will be horse work," said Sharpe, disconsolately. "There isn't a rhyme to Biffen's." "Oh! isn't there? What about 'spiffing'?" Sharpe choked.
"That was a particularly low one," said Cotton angrily; "and anyway, you avaricious beggar, you've got thundering good terms, for it is hardly likely that Biffen's can really be cock-house. There's Corker's house, with Bourne and Hodgson and a few more good men. You're a sight more likely to see my three sovs, that I am yours."
"Lancaster has given me this salt to analyze, Todd. I think there's copper in it." "What have you been up to, that Lancaster has run you in? Half-holiday, too!" "He hasn't run me in," said Grim, sulkily. "As a special favour he's let me come in here to work a little myself. I did a ripping chemistry paper last week, and " "Oh, I see. Are you going to give Biffen's another leg up, too?"
"Biffen," said good old Corker, audibly, "your house is fortunate in having Acton, and St. Amory such a good amateur coach in classics. Cock-house, too, bless me!" And can you wonder that Biffen's, frenzied with delight, carried Raven and Acton shoulder high through the gas-lit streets?
He was received back into the fold of his own particular set with more éclat than he felt he deserved. "Here's old Bourne gone and sacked Acton," said Grim. "Sure Acton hasn't sacked him?" suggested Rogers. "Best fellow breathing," said Bourne, fervently. "Still, he's Biffen's." "I don't care whether he's a water-lily or not he can't help that, you know, poor fellow." "Why should he?
'Have you seen a coat lying about here? was Biffen's first question. 'I threw mine over. 'What did you do that for? 'There are some valuable papers in the pockets. They searched in vain; on neither side of the roof was the coat discoverable. 'You must have pitched it into the street, said the man.
Fact is, Dick, I feel a bit bored by the patronage of Taylor's and Merishall's, and Sharpe's and Corker's, and all the rest of the houses." "Oh! Biffen's laid himself out for that, you must see." "I don't fancy Bourne's sneers and Hodgson's high stilts." "Haven't noticed either," said Dick. "H'm!" said Acton, rather nettled by Dick's dry tone. "I have. As for the niggers "
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