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Daily his companions marvelled anew at the duration of what was, to them, the pettiest of "affairs." But Ivan's nature was ridiculously intense; and calf-love had become, in his eyes, the most serious thing in life.
It became unmeaning with much use, so that it left a fellow completely in the dark. "Just about everybody says that about her at first," he remarked. "Did you?" she asked him, still politely. "I did a heap worse than that," said Weary, grimly determined. "I had a bad case of calf-love and made a fool uh myself generally." "What fun!" chirped the schoolma'am with an unconvincing little laugh.
'I would have said, most probably I will not be certain of my exact words in a suppositious case that you were a young fool, but not a dishonourable young fool, and I should have told you not to let your thoughts run upon a calf-love until you had magnified it into a passion.
Of an amiable disposition, and without independence of character, he might have been guided by a judicious parent through all the perils of his calf-love for Fanny French; thrown upon his own feeble resources, he regarded himself as a victim of the traditional struggle between prosaic age and nobly passionate youth, and resolved at all hazards to follow the heroic course which meant, first of all, a cold taciturnity towards his father, and, as to his future conduct, a total disregard of the domestic restraints which he had hitherto accepted.
He stood looking down at his wife with a wistful and serious look upon his face. "Dick's past the age of calf-love. We can't expect him to tumble from one passion to another; and he's not easily moved.
The sudden reference to the time-when of that old passionate relation contained an implication that it was not unspeakable per se although its threat had been that it would do its worst as a cupboard-skeleton but only owing to the childish silliness of a mere calf-love, a reciprocal misapprehension soon forgotten. Treated with contempt, its pretensions to skeletonhood fell through.
The girl was deeply moved by this revelation of the heart of a strong man made tender as a woman's by a power centering in her own humble self, and, being utterly without experience of the emotion even in its protective form of calf-love, which is the varioloid of the genuine infection, she imagined through sheer sympathy that she shared his passion.
A yearning peace is in Paul's heart, and the pretty distant cousin is near at hand, with a smell of dry lavender in her dress. The first twining of feeling and belief is here, the earliest of many of those juggleries of Nature which make a fool of reason. Oh, sweet hour! oh, happy world! oh, holy place, where she is! Oh, harmless, innocent calf-love!
"Put it on the ground of calf-love, if you want to. I'll tell Samuel you want to get Sam out of town because you're afraid he's falling in love with Mrs. Richie; and you'd like to consult him about it." But the old man began a scrabbling retreat. "No! No!" he said, putting on his hat with shaking hands. "No, don't tell anybody anything. I'll find some other way out of it. Let it go.
Perhaps, after all, it is rather pitiful that this calf-love, confidently derided by omniscient, sensible middle-age, should be so tender and so beautiful a thing. Once it is crushed out of us, we are not likely ever again to be burdened with a feeling at all similar to it.
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