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Updated: June 28, 2025
We slid behind blackberry bushes and ash piles and across ditches and over hedge fences, and whistled. We were so happy we could hardly pucker. Think of it! There was Ole Skjarsen, the most uncontrollable force in Nature, following us like a yellow pup with his dinner three days overdue. It was as fascinating as guiding a battleship by wireless.
"And now," said Petey, ignoring the interruption, "the final ceremony is at hand. Do not fear. Your trials are over. In the dark recesses of this secret chamber above you we have discussed your bearing in the trials that have beset you. It has pleased us. You have been found worthy to continue toward the high goal. Ole Skjarsen, we are now ready to receive you into full membership."
Did I ever tell you of the time when we initiated Ole Skjarsen into Eta Bita Pie, and how the ceremony backfired and very nearly blew us all into the discard? No? Well, don't get impatient and look in the back of the book. I'll tell it now and cut as many corners as I can. As I have told you before, Ole Skjarsen was a little slow in grasping the real beauties of football science.
"Come rite on!" snorted Ole. "Aye receeve yu into membership all rite. Yust come on down." "It won't work, Petey," Bangs groaned. Petey kicked his shins as a sign to shut up. "Ole Skjarsen, son of Skjar Oleson, stand up!" he said, sinking his voice another story. Ole got up. It was plain to be seen that he was getting interested.
It was the brightest young dream that was ever busted by a fat loafer in brass buttons. Then I saw Ole Skjarsen and had my one big inspiration. "Excuse me," I said, rushing over to Pubby, "but you'll have to mosey right out of here. There's Ole Skjarsen, and he looks ugly." "Oh, my word!" said Pubby; he remembered Ole from the night before.
Skjarsen," he said apologetically, "if it will not annoy you too much, would you mind running the same way the rest of the team does? I don't insist on it, mind you, but it looks so much better to the audience, you know." "Jas," said Ole; "Aye ban fule, Aye gass, but yu ban tu polite to say it." Were you ever Hamburgered by a real, live college fraternity?
Five of us crept over to the hole and looked down. "Aye har yu, yu leetle Baked Pies!" said Ole, waking in an instant. "Yust come on down. Aye ban vaiting long enough to smash yu!" "Mr. Skjarsen," began Petey in the regular dark-lantern voice that all secret societies use "Mr. Skjarsen for as such we must still call you the final test is over. You have acquitted yourself nobly.
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