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Updated: June 18, 2025
"And they comed from Thrums!" cried Elspeth, while Tommy cried, "Petey and the others got a lot sent from Thrums, and I bought the bridies from them, and they gave me the bannock and the kebbock for nuthin'!" Their mother did not utter the cry of rapture which Tommy expected so confidently that he could have done it for her; instead, she pulled her two children toward her, and the great moment was like to be a tearful rather than an ecstatic one, for Elspeth had begun to whimper, and even Tommy but by a supreme effort he shouldered reality to the door.
But Petey wasn't that kind. He had been used to running the whole college and messing up the universe as far as one could see from the Siwash belfry if things didn't suit him. So he picked out the likeliest-looking institution on Dearborn Street and offered it a position as his employer. He was on the payroll before the president got over his daze.
When I want to paralyze an alumnus of some rival college with admiration and envy, I tell him how Petey and I manufactured a real Wild West college buildings, Faculty, bad men and all for one day only, for the benefit of an Englishman who had gotten fifteen hundred miles inland without noticing the general color scheme of the inhabitants.
With that she crawled through the hole, and when once on the stone ledge, she put her hand in on the boy's head. "Lift up your leg and hang tight to Petey," she shuddered, and the blind boy did as he was bidden, and Jinnie pulled him, with the dog and fiddle, through the opening. She put him on his knees in front of her with her arms tightly about him. "Jinnie, Jinnie!" moaned Bobbie.
Old Petey had told Tommy that, on the whole, the greatest pleasure in life on a Saturday evening is to put your back against a stile that leads into the Den and rally the sweethearts as they go by. The lads, when they see you, want to go round by the other stile, but the lasses like it, and often the sport ends spiritedly with their giving you a clout on the head.
And if Stanley Mitchell's facetious friends begin any hilarity with me I'll transact negotiations with 'em sure! So I put it up to you, Petey square and aboveboard what are they tryin' to work on Stan now? "'To get his mine, you idjit! says Pete. 'Now be reasonable, says I. 'How'd they know we got any mine? 'Didn't you tote a sample out of that blisterin' old desert? says Pete.
"Hell, Reverend," said Petey emphatically, "she's the biggest school in the world." The Reverend was a man of guile. He didn't bat an eye. "How many students has the college?" he inquired. "We've got a hundred, all studying books and learning things," said Petey proudly. "Reahly, now?" said the Reverend; "I say, reahly? And these cows! Might I ask if these cows are a part of the college?"
Naturally, it worried Petey almost to death to see the dear old Coll. disintegrating under the Scroggs Inquisition, and he used to sit around the frat house with his head on his hands for hours, smoking his pipe, which had the largest bowl in school, and combing his convolutions for a plan. Then, along in March, he electrified the whole school by taking Martha Scroggs to the college promenade.
As Ole stood waiting, however, Petey swung himself down and landed beside him. He cut the ropes that bound his wrists, jerked off the pillowslip and cut off the blindfold. Then he grabbed Ole's mastodonic paw. "Shake, brother!" he said. Nobody breathed for a few seconds. It was darned terrifying, I can tell you.
"Ay, and wha ruined Jean Myles's life?" his mother cried passionately. Tommy did not know, but he thought that young Petey might know, for young Petey had said: "If I had been Jean Myles I would have spat in Aaron's face rather than marry him." Mrs. Sandys seemed pleased to hear this.
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