How young gentlemen, now, can bring themselves for to tell such lies, is to me, now, a matter of amazement, like, that I can't noways get over. Talb. Oh, farmer, such lies are very witty, though you and I don't just now like the wit of them. This is fun, this is quizzing; but you don't know what we young gentlemen mean by quizzing. Farm. Ay, but I do though, to my cost, ever since last year.
And as he has no money to buy votes he! he! he! we are safe enough. Talb. That's well done, Wheeler; fight the by-battle there with Bursal. Now you are sure of the main with Lord John. Lord J. Sure! I never made Mr. Wheeler any promise yet. Wheel.
"Then there's he with the purse that's as long as my arm; His father's a tanner, but then where's the harm? Heir to houses, and hunters, and horseponds in fee, Won't his skins sure soon buy him a pedigree?" Lord J. Encore! encore! Why, Rory, I did not think you could make so good a song. Rory. Sure 'twas none of I made it 'twas Talbot here. Talb. Rory.
He did not waste a word of it; upon my conscience, I wrote it all though I'll engage you didn't think I could write a good thing. *From beginning to end. Lord J. You will excuse me, sir, if I cannot believe two contradictory assertions within two minutes. Mr. Rory. Well, if he WILL go, let him go then, and much good may it do him. Nay, but don't you go too. Talb. O Rory, what have you done? Rory.
There's a stroke, in the first place, for Wheeler, you take it? Talb. O yes, yes, we take it; go on. Rory sings. "I'm true game to the last, and no Wheeler for me. Of all birds, beasts, or fishes, that swim in the sea, Webb'd or finn'd, black or white, man or child, Whig or Tory, None but Talbot, O, Talbot's the dog for Rory." Talb. "Talbot the dog" is much obliged to you.
Join, join, both of ye why don't you join? "Who'll buy my Lord John? the arch fishwoman cried, A nice oyster shut up in a choice shell of pride." Rory. But join or ye spoil all. Talb. You have spoiled all, indeed. Mr. Talbot, Lord John thanks you. Rory. Lord John! blood and thunder! I forgot you were by quite and clean. Lord John thanks you, Mr. Talbot: this is the second part of the caricature.
J. But of all things in the world I hate to be laughed at. Listen to me, and don't fumble in your pockets while I'm talking to you. Talb. I'm fumbling for oh, here it is. Now, Lord John, I once did laugh at you behind your back, and what's droll enough, it was at your back I laughed. Here's a caricature I drew of you I really am sorry I did it; but 'tis best to show it to you myself.
What is the matter, dear mother? You used to say, that seeing my brother always made you feel ten years younger; yet even while he was here, you had, in spite of all your efforts to conceal them, those sudden fits of sadness. Mrs. Talb. The Montem is not it to-morrow? Ay, but my boy is not sure of being captain. Louisa.
Landlord, take your money, and no more words. Wheel. This is very genteel of you, Talbot. I always thought you would do the genteel thing as I knew you to be so generous and considerate. Talb. Don't waste your fine speeches, Wheeler, I advise you, this election time. Keep them for Bursal or Lord John, or some of those who like them. They won't go down with me. Good morning to you.
I would not say a word to Talbot; full of spirits as he was this morning, I would not say a word to him, till after the Montem, of what has happened. Louisa. And what has happened, dear mother? Sit down, you tremble. Mrs. Talb. A messenger brought me that from town a few hours ago. "By an express from Portsmouth, we hear the Bombay Castle East Indiaman is lost, with all your fortune on board."