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Updated: May 10, 2025
What a relief to snarl at wife an' frinds wanst more, to smoke a seegar with th' thrust magnate that owns th' cider facthry near th' station, to take ye'er nap in th' afthernoon undisthurbed be th' chirp iv th' snap-shot! 'Tis th' day afther iliction I'd like f'r to be a candydate, Hinnissy, no matther how it wint." "An' what's become iv th' vice-prisidintial candydates?" Mr. Hennessy asked.
That puts guts into a man," quoth Jim. "Shall we have another? One more?" "Not now. The next shall be on me. Let's look around," I gasped. "We'll find her," he promised. "Take a stroll. I'll steer you right. Have a seegar, anyway." As smoking vied with drinking, here in the Big Tent where even the dancers cavorted with lighted cigars in their mouths, I saw fit to humor him.
He was that scared when this here gigantic ruffian stopped him I just happened to be a-setting in among the cedar-bushes at the time, smoking a seegar and looking on sort of casual he couldn't do nothing more'n yell out he wasn't going to shoot, and not to murder him; and then down he jumped from the box me a-smoking away looking at him, and this here ruffian a-shooting his Winchester across the top of the coach to where he said he thought he seen a jack-rabbit and cut out the near wheeler; and then he scrambled up anyhow on that mule's back, and away he went down the barranca as hard as hell!"
"No, no, Jim it won't do," went on Ryan with bland decisiveness. "What you want is the two of them together, hey? on a nice dark stretch o' road, and old Orrick and a few good fellows along to help. You ain't the only one that's got it in for Stanhope, are you? An' you want Maginnis too, I guess? Come on in the orfice and talk about it over a seegar." Coligny Smith had told the truth.
Gee, you ought to smoke a fat black seegar and wear a silk hat when you ride in one of these! I feel like a parade." He was like a boy on a holiday, as always when in Europe. "But let me tell you about this girl, won't you!" "Oh, it's a girl! What's her name? What's she do?" "Her name's Mizzi." "Mizzi what?" "I don't know. She's a hod carrier. She " "That's all right, Wallie. I'm here now.
Look at that big ugly barn full of bad pictures yes, sir, I went to Mass regular, when I was a boy petit garçon well, every one was the same, sure. But now, ah! excuse me. A seegar? Yes? You will thry one?"
'They'se another hero down in Halstead Sthreet that's been marrid. Go down an' shivaree him. An' you, me thrusted collagues iv th' press, disperse to ye'er homes, I'd say. 'Th' keyholes is closed f'r th' night, I'd say. An' thin I'd bolt th' dure an' I'd say, 'George, take off ye'er coat an' pull up to th' fire. Here's a noggin' iv whisky near ye'er thumb an' a good seegar f'r ye to smoke.
Now and then he would pause and by a deft movement of his lips roll the "seegar" to the other corner of his mouth, take a fresh grip on it and resume his oration. Samson wrote in his diary: "He said a lot of foolish things that made us laugh." Twenty years later he put this note under that entry: "The funny thing about it was really this; they all came true."
"'They've named a perfume afther ye, a shirt waist, a paper collar, a five cint seegar, a lot iv childer. Nay more, a breakfast dish christened f'r ye is on ivry lip. Will I forward th' soot collect? he says. "'No, sind th' bill to me mother, says th' boy. 'An' meet me in th' park at tin, he says. "So 'tis planned to seize th' throne, but it comes to nawthin'." "Why's that?" asked Mr. Hennessy.
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