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Updated: June 26, 2025
Horatio!" gasped Pendlam, a good deal startled. "Too late to escape!" And Horatio drew a tract upon him, like a revolver. "Here is something, sir, which I think will suit your case," levelling it at Pendlam's throat. "Ha!" stammered Pendlam, reading the title, "'The Theatre a Stronghold of Vice; a Sermon, by " "By the Reverend John Henry Pendlam," roared out Horatio.
"Pendlam, the distinguished temperance-preacher!" A lurid smile played over the grim features of the Practical Organizer. "Pendlam has outgrown his former opinions," he said, with a look of hate at Horatio. "Not precisely," said Pendlam. "I have simply enlarged them, or rather added to them. I preach temperance the same; but every man must be his own master.
"Don't think to disarm me by a pleasantry," replied Pendlam, brandishing his spiritual weapon. "This is my sermon on the theatre, which you engaged to hear me preach; I have had it printed for you." "Really," said Horatio, with a humorous smile, "I had forgotten my promise. Besides, I was engaged, let me see, it was two Sundays ago, wasn't it? yes, I was engaged to dine with Miss Kellerton."
She smiled sweetly, and said with simplicity that she scarcely understood any thing that had been said. I could see that Pendlam was a little shocked. From clear, joyous heights of poetic discourse, we looked down, and saw how far off below was her beingless mind. To the vision we then enjoyed, there was something thick and earthy in her expression.
He urged me to stay and dine; and as I desired an opportunity to converse further with Susan, I consented. I was surprised to see a dish of roast meat come upon the table, Pendlam having, for the past year, preached vegetarianism. But he assured me that he had not changed his theory of dietetics. "There are times, however, when we require the magnetisms of certain animal foods.
As we conducted him away, his condition might have been taken for that of many others who get into difficulty in bar-rooms. Arrived at his boarding-house, he thanked us with pathetic earnestness, and urged us to go in. "On one condition," said Horatio, "that you say no more about the theatres." Pendlam smiled faintly.
And she gathered up her Sunday things, which she had taken off in the parlour, with an air of offended piety that occasioned a general smile. Pendlam smiled with the rest. "Well, Horatio, you next, what did you think of my sermon?" "I liked it." "Good! but give your reason." "Because you said nothing about the theatre.
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