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Updated: May 20, 2025
The bar-keeper of the Magnolia is er I may say, sir, facile princeps in the concoction of mint juleps, and there is a back room where I have occasionally conferred with political leaders at election time. It is but a step, sir in fact, on Main Street round the corner."
"Two simultaneous juleps will enhance the higher welfare," he explained airily. "Sir, your Mr. Varden was induced to place a somewhat larger order with us than he protested to be your intention. Trusting you to exonerate him from all so-and-so and that these few words, etcetera!" He depleted the elder glass of its liquor, waved it in the air, cried, "Health, host!" and set it upon the table.
Another bubble exploded! We live in a sensational age." Now, while it is true that the ladies, "one and all," had spoken with entire enthusiasm of their afternoon at the unpretentious home of my neighbor, I, nevertheless, deemed it vital to hold plain speech with that impulsive woman immediately. I saw, indeed, that I should have acted after the incident of the mint juleps.
I very willingly put the name of Mr. Robert Carruthers to the paper, for I do not like those juleps, and I persuaded the nice large lady that she go in that car of my Uncle, the General Robert, with me away from the proximity to my chief, the Gouverneur Faulkner, to a place in the city where we could drink that ice cream soda water that I do so love.
"It occurred to me," the major would begin he was always ceremonious "that perhaps you might have found your duties at the at your place of occupation sufficiently arduous to enable you, Mr. Hargraves, to appreciate what the poet might well have had in his mind when he wrote, 'tired Nature's sweet restorer, one of our Southern juleps." It was a fascination to Hargraves to watch him make it.
That puts him in th' proper position to inspect armor plate f'r th' imminent Carnegie, an' insthruct admirals that's been cruisin' an' fightin' an' dhrinkin' mint juleps f'r thirty years. He must know th' difference bechune silo an' insilage, how to wean a bull calf, an' th' best way to cure a spavin. If he has that information, he is fixed f'r th' job.
A hot dead wind drifted in great puffs through the city, and ragged masses of vapor swept the purple sky; an unsavory night altogether, one of those nights of hopeless lassitude when one feels, if one is at home, like doing nothing but drink mint juleps and smoke cigarettes.
"It certainly has, or else this is the finest article of wine that has ever passed my lips." 'It's not the best quality by a good deal; still it is pretty fair. But won't you try a mint-julep, or a punch, by way of variety?" "No objection," was the brief response. "Which will you choose?" "I'll take a julep." "Two juleps," said Watson to the waiter who entered immediately afterwards.
It is not too late to name a commission for this purpose; and, in order that the question may be fairly treated on its merits, we presume to suggest to the Executive the propriety of nominating, as our commissioner, some confirmed advocate of the system of "juleps."
Both these races, partly through climate, or through derivation of blood, and partly through the contagion of habits inevitable to brothers of the same nation, are tainted carnally with the appetite for brandy, for slings, for juleps.
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