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Updated: June 10, 2025
'I understand, love, now, that I shall never be anything more than somewhat like Madame de Fischtaminel. 'You refer to her neckerchief, I suppose: well, I did give it to her, it was for her birthday. You see, we were formerly 'Ah, you were formerly more intimate than you are now! Without replying to this, he added, 'But it's altogether moral.
Caroline has noticed the thickness of a letter sheet between this velvet and this table: she hits upon a letter to Hector instead of hitting upon one to Madame de Fischtaminel, who has gone to Plombieres Springs, and reads the following: "My dear Hector: "I pity you, but you have acted wisely in entrusting me with a knowledge of the difficulties in which you have voluntarily involved yourself.
'I understand, love, now, that I shall never be anything more than somewhat like Madame de Fischtaminel. 'You refer to her neckerchief, I suppose: well, I did give it to her, it was for her birthday. You see, we were formerly 'Ah, you were formerly more intimate than you are now! Without replying to this, he added, 'But it's altogether moral.
On her part, it is a delicious joke, a new jest to enliven their married life, and one dictated by the purest intentions; while on Adolphe's part, it is a piece of cruelty worthy a Carib, a disregard of his wife's heart, and a deliberate plan to give her pain. But that is nothing. "So you are really in love with Madame de Fischtaminel?" Caroline asks.
But he guesses what it all means, as he sees the cloth inscribed with the delightful ideas which Madame de Fischtaminel or the syndic of Chaumontel's affair have often inscribed for him upon tables quite as elegant. "Whom are you expecting?" he asks in his turn. "Who could it be, except Ferdinand?" replies Caroline. "And is he keeping you waiting?" "He is sick, poor fellow."
The next day she asks you, with a charming air of interest, "How are you coming on with Madame de Fischtaminel?" When you go out, she says: "Go and drink something calming, my dear." For, in their anger with a rival, all women, duchesses even, will use invectives, and even venture into the domain of Billingsgate; they make an offensive weapon of anything and everything.
When Madame de Fischtaminel narrated this little scene in a devotee's life, dressing it up with choice by-play, acted out as ladies of the world know how to act out their anecdotes, I took the liberty of saying that it was the Canticle of canticles in action. "If her husband doesn't come," said Justine to the cook, "what will become of us? She has already thrown her chemise in my face."
He brings the elegant Madame Fischtaminel, a friend whose good graces you cultivate, your girdle for checking corpulency, bits of cosmetic for dyeing your moustache, old waistcoats discolored at the arm-holes, stockings slightly soiled at the heels and somewhat yellow at the toes. It is quite impossible to remark that these stains are caused by the leather!
"I have nothing to say against Monsieur de Fischtaminel: he does not gamble, he is indifferent to women, he doesn't like wine, and he has no expensive fancies: he possesses, as you said, all the negative qualities which make husbands passable. Then, what is the matter with him? Well, mother, he has nothing to do. We are together the whole blessed day!
Madame de Fischtaminel and Caroline, who have become, through the efforts of Madame Foullepointe, the best friends in the world, have even gone so far as to learn and employ that feminine free-masonry, the rites of which cannot be made familiar by any possible initiation.
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