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Updated: May 2, 2025


While this scene was going on, Mrs Crashington and her brother were still seated quietly enjoying their tea at least, enjoying it as much as such characters can be said to enjoy anything. When Ned had gone out, as before mentioned, Phil remarked: "I wouldn't rouse him like that, Mag, if I was you." "But he's so aggravatin'," pleaded Mrs Crashington.

At that moment, there was a great crash, followed by a loud cry, and a cheer from the multitude, as the roof fell in, sending up a magnificent burst of sparks and flame, in the midst of which Ned Crashington was borne from the field of battle.

"Out o' the way!" cried Ned Crashington to two boys who appeared to be rather curious about the operations of the firemen. "I say," exclaimed the Bloater in great excitement, "why that's the 'ouse w'ere Martha lives!" "Who's Martha?" asked Ned, without interrupting his operation of screwing on an additional length of hose. "W'y, the friend o' Joe Dashwood's wife Martha Martha Reading, you know."

"Now, then, stoopid," cried Mrs Crashington, turning quickly round on her husband, as if to counteract the little touch of amiability into which she had been betrayed, "how long are you going to stand there in people's way staring at the fire? What are you thinking of?" "I was thinking of you, Maggie." "H'm! thinking no good of me, I dare say," replied Maggie, sharply.

"Hallo, Mag!" exclaimed Sparks, a little surprised. "Hush!" said Mrs Crashington, admitting him, "speak low." Thus admonished, Mr Sparks asked in a hoarse whisper, "what was up?" "Ned's had a bad fall, Phil," whispered Mrs Crashington, in a tremulous tone that was so unlike her usual voice as to make Sparks look at her in surprise not unmingled with anxiety.

Finding society gruffer than usual that morning, and not happening to meet with his or anybody else's fortune in any of the streets, through which he passed, he resolved to visit Martha Reading's abode; did so, and found her "not at home." With despairing disgust he then went to visit his sister. Mrs Crashington was obviously at home, for she opened the door to him, and held up her finger.

Mr Joseph Dowler was also there, self-important as ever, and ready for action at a moment's notice; besides a number of friends of the bride and bridegroom, among whom was a pert young gentleman, friend of Mr Dowler, and a Mr Crashington, friend of Mr Webster, an earnest, enthusiastic old gentleman, who held the opinion that most things in the world were wrong, and who wondered incessantly "why in the world people would not set to work at once to put them all right!"

At last silence was obtained, and Dowler exclaimed, "Sir," to which Crashington replied, "Sir," and several of the company cried, laughingly, "Sit down, Dowler." It is certain that Dowler would not have obeyed the order, had not his pert young friend caught him by the coat-tails and pulled him down with such violence that he sat still astonished!

During this period, also, Ned Crashington recovered his wonted health and vigour, while his wife, to some extent, recovered her senses, and, instead of acting as an irritant blister on her husband, began really to aim at unanimity. The result was, that Ned's love for her, which had only been smothered a little, burst forth with renewed energy, and Maggie found that in peace there is prosperity.

Joe, who sat smoking in silence on the other side of the fire, nodded, and, turning his head round, advised Fred Crashington and little May to make "less row." "But we can't put it out widout a row!" remonstrated the Rosebud. "What! have you found a fire in this cupboard, as well as in the one o' the old house?" asked Joe, with a laugh. "Iss, iss; an' it's a far wuss fire than the last one!"

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