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Updated: May 9, 2025
He had a fancy for trying balancing feats with a billiard-cue and two ivory balls, such as Barberou, one of his friends, had performed. They invariably fell, and, rolling along the floor between people's legs, got lost in some distant corner. The waiter, who had to rise every time to search for them on all-fours under the benches, ended by making complaints.
Bouvard smoked his pipe, loved cheese, regularly took his half-glass of brandy. Pécuchet snuffed, at dessert ate only preserves, and soaked a piece of sugar in his coffee. One was self-confident, flighty, generous; the other prudent, thoughtful, and thrifty. In order to please him, Bouvard desired to introduce Pécuchet to Barberou.
Thus the opinions of persons of taste are unreliable, while the judgment of the multitude is incomprehensible. Bouvard submitted the problem to Barberou. Pécuchet, on his side, wrote to Dumouchel. The ex-commercial traveller was astonished at the effeminacy engendered by provincial life. His old Bouvard was turning into a blockhead; in short, "he was no longer in it at all."
The professor proposed to him an epistolary interchange between them, of which he would make use to keep Pécuchet well up in literature; and, after fresh felicitations, wished him good health. Barberou exhibited more sensibility in taking leave of Bouvard. He expressly gave up a domino-party, promised to go to see him "over there," ordered two aniseed cordials, and embraced him.
Bouvard protested, and he thought he had a recollection of artificial corpses being manufactured according to the custom of hot countries. Barberou, with whom he communicated, gave him some information about the matter. For ten francs a month they could have one of the manikins of M. Auzoux; and the following week the carrier from Falaise deposited before their gate an oblong box.
Sometimes they made up their minds; then, fearing they would repent later, they changed their opinion, the place having appeared unhealthy, or exposed to the sea-breeze, or too close to a factory, or difficult of access. Barberou came to their rescue.
Barberou set to work with zeal, believing it was Bouvard's own case, and calling him an old dotard, even though he congratulated him about it. "At my age!" said Pécuchet. "Is it not a melancholy thing? But why did she do this?" "You pleased her." "She ought to have given me warning." "Does passion reason?" And Bouvard renewed his complaints about Madame Bordin.
The first thing to do was to send the young woman away. She protested with an air of candour. Pécuchet's case was, however, serious; but he was ashamed to consult a physician. Bouvard thought of applying to Barberou. They gave him particulars about the matter, in order that he might communicate with a doctor who would deal with the case by correspondence.
Thanks to Barberou, they penetrated into the green-room of a little theatre. Dumouchel got them tickets for a sitting at the Academy. They inquired about discoveries, read the prospectuses, and this curiosity developed their intelligence. At the end of a horizon, growing every day more remote, they perceived things at the same time confused and marvellous.
Bouvard had quitted Paris only on the third day, as he had to dine once more with Barberou. He arrived in the coach-yard at the last moment; then he woke up before the cathedral of Rouen: he had mistaken the diligence. In the evening, all the places for Caen were booked.
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