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All this time I lay like one stunned; my body resting, and renewing its strength, but I myself in an almost idiotic state else surely I could not have taken the stupid interest which I remember I did in all Amante's energetic preparations for disguise. I absolutely recollect once the feeling of a smile coming over my stiff face as some new exercise of her cleverness proved a success.
We had to drop into the stream, which came above our knees as we waded to the bank. There we stood, stiff and shivering. Even Amante's courage seemed to fail. 'We must pass this night in shelter, somehow, said she. For indeed the rain was coming down pitilessly. I said nothing.
She then took her supper, which was evidently apportioned out to her with a sparing hand, as, even if the idea had come into her head, she had not enough to offer us any. Fortunately, warmth was all that we required, and that, thanks to Amante's cares, was returning to our chilled bodies.
Again faintness stole over me; but just as I was sinking into the horrible feeling of nothingness, I heard Amante's voice close to me, saying, "Drink this, madame, and let us begone. All is ready." I let her put her arm under my head and raise me, and pour something down my throat.
All this time I lay like one stunned; my body resting, and renewing its strength, but I myself in an almost idiotic state else surely I could not have taken the stupid interest which I remember I did in all Amante's energetic preparations for disguise. I absolutely recollect once the feeling of a smile coming over my stiff face as some new exercise of her cleverness proved a success.
And yet not all my own, for the faithful Amante's delight and glory in the babe almost exceeded mine; in outward show it certainly did. We had not been able to afford any attendance beyond what a neighbouring sage-femme could give, and she came frequently, bringing in with her a little store of gossip, and wonderful tales culled out of her own experience, every time.
"The door was not locked, only closed. And here she was found dead is she not, monsieur? with her face down on her pillow, and her beautiful hair all scattered wild; she never would let me tie it up, saying it made her head ache. Such hair!" said the waiting-maid, lifting up a long golden tress, and letting it fall again. I remembered Amante's words the night before, and crept close up to her.
"Let me in." I let him in, and he was as alert as I in bolting and barring the door. Then he came and whispered to me his doleful tale. He had come from the hospital in the opposite quarter of the town, the hospital which he visited; he should have been with me sooner, but he had feared lest he should be watched. He had come from Amante's death-bed. Her fears of the jeweller were too well founded.
I never stirred abroad, and saw no one, and Amante's want of knowledge of German kept her in a state of comparative isolation. At length my child was born my poor worse than fatherless child. It was a girl, as I had prayed for. I had feared lest a boy might have something of the tiger nature of its father, but a girl seemed all my own.
And yet not all my own, for the faithful Amante's delight and glory in the babe almost exceeded mine; in outward show it certainly did. We had not been able to afford any attendance beyond what a neighbouring sage-femme could give, and she came frequently, bringing in with her a little store of gossip, and wonderful tales culled out of her own experience, every time.
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