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Updated: June 10, 2025
Pretyman wrote a life of Pitt, and according to Macaulay it enjoys the distinction of being the worst biography ever written. Lord Rosebery, however, declares the book is not so bad as it might be. I believe there are two other biographies equally stupid: Weems' "Life of Washington," and the book on Gainsborough, by Thicknesse.
The lower worke and the timbers thereof were out of measure strong, being framed of plankes and ribs foure or fiue foote in thicknesse, insomuch that no bullets could pierce them, but such as were discharged hard at hand: which afterward prooued true, for a great number of bullets were founde to sticke fast within the massie substance of those thicke plankes.
I notice that in his Year's Journey through France and Spain in 1795, Thicknesse favourably contrasts the Frenchman, who only took wine at meals, with the Englishman, who, "earning disease and misery at his bottle, sits at it many hours after dinner and always after supper."
The lower works and the timbers thereof were out of measure strong, being framed of plankes and ribs fours or five foote in thicknesse, insomuch that no bullets could pierce them, but such as were discharged hard at hand; which afterward prooved true, for a great number of bullets were found to sticke fast within the massie substance of those thicke plankes.
The type is scarcely that of the essential Englishman, yet it is one type, and a notably interesting type, really racy of the soil. Borrow less of a fine gentleman than Thicknesse, but more of a genius belonged to the type.
He also loaned him a fiddle and presented him a viola da gamba, and often invited him to dinner. For these favors Gainsborough promised to paint a portrait of Thicknesse, but never got beyond washing in the background. During ten years he made thirty-seven excuses for not doing the work, and as for Mrs.
Thicknesse was very proud of his art connections. He had but one theme Gainsborough! People of note began to find their way to the studio of the painter-man in the Circus. Gainsborough was gracious, handsome and healthy fresh from the country. He met all nobility on a frank equality God had made him a gentleman.
'No, I won't, then, growled out Thicknesse. 'I lends nothing on the security of the whigs or the Poles either. As for whigs, they're cheats; as for the Poles, they've got no cash. 'Well, then, urged the other, 'there's a book as belonged to Pope, Byron's Poems, valued at forty pounds, because it's got Pope's identical scratch on the back; what do you think of that for security?
Gainsborough, she once had the temerity to hand the redoubtable Thicknesse his cocked hat and cane and show him the door. From this, Thicknesse is emboldened to make certain remarks about Mrs. Gainsborough's pedigree, and to suggest that if Thomas Gainsborough had married a different woman he might have been a different painter.
Bolton being a literary character, and always upon such news of the day as is exclusively possessed by that talented individual. 'Can you lend me a ten-pound note till Christmas? inquired the hairdresser of the stomach. 'Where's your security, Mr. Clip? 'My stock in trade, there's enough of it, I'm thinking, Mr. Thicknesse. Some fifty wigs, two poles, half-a-dozen head blocks, and a dead Bruin.
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