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"Say, Joe, what're you in mourning for?" "I'm in mourning for my little dog!" "Your little dog. Why, your little dog ain't dead, is it?" "Yes, my little dog's dead!" "Well, Joe, I'm sorry to hear your little dog's dead. What was the matter with your little dog?" "My little dog died last week." "Yes, your little dog died last week?..." "He swallowed a tape-measure!..."
My utter satisfaction could not be spoiled by feeling, as one does in the case of the earlier propositions of Euclid, that I had been proving what I knew already something about which I could have made myself sure by the use of a foot-rule or a tape-measure. I had acquired knowledge, by an act of pure reasoning and not merely through the senses.
"It is a charming place for a vacation. I would show you about myself if I were not bound on an important mission." Here the Scarecrow sighed deeply. "Have you a family?" he asked the A-B-Sea Serpent curiously. "Yes, indeed," replied the monster, snapping its tape-measure tongue in and out, "I have five great-grandmothers, twenty-one grandnieces, seven brothers, and six sisters-in-law!"
The head was a huge square block with a serpent's face and long, curling, tape-measure tongue. The little one was very much smaller and seemed to consist of hundreds of rattles, wood, celluloid, and rubber, fastened together with wires. Every time it moved, the rattles tinkled. Its face, however, was not unpleasant, so the Scarecrow took heart and made a deep bow.
Arrived there, I had to pass several men, all in their shirt-sleeves, who were attacking mountains of cloth with long, narrow knives. One of these directed me to a remote window, in front of which I presently found Nodelman lecturing a man who wore a tape-measure around his neck Nodelman kept me waiting, without offering me a scat, a good half-hour.
He swallowed a tape-measure and died by inches!..." Hinde laughed. "Do people pay good money to listen to that sort of stuff?" "You're a journalist," Cream replied, "and you ought to know they pay money to read worse than that!" "So they do," Hinde admitted.
Damon. "Bless my tape-measure! the way to win a race is to beat." "Not this kind of a race," and the young inventor spoke seriously. "If I got ahead of Andy now, he'd simply trail along and follow us. That's his game. He wants me to be the path-finder, for, since I cast a doubt on the correctness of the map, a copy of which he stole, he isn't sure where he's going.
He now produced a tape-measure and began measuring Cowperwood's arms, legs, chest, waist, hips, etc. He called out the color of his eyes, his hair, his mustache, and, looking into his mouth, exclaimed, "Teeth, all sound."
Another writer in the same number tells of a cat in Huddersfield, England, belonging to Canon Beardsley, who helps himself to a reel of cotton from the work-basket, takes it on the floor, and plays with it as long as he likes, and then jumps up and puts the reel back in its place again; just as our Bobinette used to get his tape-measure, although the latter never was known to put it away.
In the moral world so far as it is a world of great achievement the tape-measure is out of place. It is only the Immeasurable that counts. And Life is not only Immeasurable but magnificently inconsistent, even incomprehensible, to those who have not the clue to its Divine Maze.
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