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Updated: May 26, 2025
But I do know that they started off a-fishin' the very day we left for Loontown, and that they come back home about the time we did, with two long strings of trout. And there wuz them that said that they ketched the trout, and them that said they bought 'em. And they brung back the antlers of a deer in their game bags, and some bones of a elk.
When I first heard that wimmen wuz goin' to make a effort to set on a Conference, it wuz on a Wednesday, as I remember well. For my companion, Josiah Allen, had drove over to Loontown in a Democrat and in a great hurry, to meet two men who wanted him to go into a speculation with 'em. And it wuz kinder curious to meditate on it, that they wuz all deacons, every one on 'em.
And each one on 'em, accordin' to their tell, ketched more trouts than the other one, and fur bigger ones, and shot more deers. Wall, Deacon Sypher'ses advice and Deacon Henzy's influenced Josiah a good deal, and I said quite a few words to him on the subject, and, suffice it to say, that the next day, about 10 A.M., we set out on our journey to Loontown.
Why, I've thought that the road between Jonesville and Loontown wuz beautiful and easy travellin'. Old Hagadone is path-master and vain of the road, and calls the men out twice a year to pay poll taxes and such by workin' it. Sugar maples, elder bushes, and shuemakes, and wild grapes and ivy run along the side of the stun wall, makin' it, I always had thought, on-approachable in beauty.
We went early, and got a seat. All the ministers of Zoar, and Jonesville, and Loontown, and Shackville wuz there, and of all the sermons that wuz preached wall, it wuz a sight. The tears jest run down most everybody's face, and when the mourners wuz addressed, why, big, hefty men all round me jest boohooed right out. Why, it wuz enough to melt a stun.
What do we know about the onseen roads that lay all about us, leadin' from Loontown and Jonesville and from one continent to the other, and mebby up through the clear fields of Light? What do we know about them still mysterious streets windin' mebby from our home and hearts to Thomas Jefferson's, and so on, mebby from star to star?
At that time of year flowers wuz dretful high, but S. Annie and Cephas had made up their minds that they must have several flower-pieces from the city nighest to Loontown. One wuz a-goin' to be a gate ajar, and one wuz to be a gate wide open, and one wuz to be a big book. Cephas asked what book I thought would be preferable to represent. And I mentioned the Bible.
And they sez, some on 'em, "Why! what are men in the Methodist meetin' house for, if it hain't to guard the more weaker sect, and keep cares offen 'em?" And one or two on 'em mentioned the words, "cooin' doves" and "sweet tender flowerets," as is the way of men at such times. They had to hurry off to tell the great news to other places in Jonesville and up as fer as Loontown and Zoar.
Now, there wuz a young chap over in Loontown who had tried doctorin' for a year or two and didn't make much by it, and he thought he see a sign up in the heavens, G. P., and he gin out that he had had a call "go preach," and went to preachin', and he didn't make so well by that as he did by his doctorin', and then he gin out that he had made a mistake in readin' the letters; instead of goin' to preach they meant "give pills," so he went back to his doctorin' agin, and is doin' first rate.
At my strong request we made a tower one day to see Stanford University, that immense schoolhouse that is doin' so much good in the world; why, good land! it is larger than you have any idee on; why, take all the schoolhouses in Jonesville and Loontown and Zoar and put 'em all together, and then add to them all the meetin' houses in all them places and then it wouldn't be half nor a quarter so big as this noble schoolhouse.
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