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Updated: June 29, 2025
Of its politics not much was to be said, seeing that they were written by my learned friend, Doctor Easley, author and compiler of 'The Polite Speech Maker, and ought never to be taken as meaning what they said.
He affects great admiration of Johnson and Goldsmith, compares his poverty with theirs, and attributes the present wretched condition of criticism to the disgrace brought upon the profession by Easley and other dilapidated priests. You will frequently see this shabby man of letters standing at the corner of Nassau and Ann streets, his hands in his pockets and his head bent in meditation.
My own reply was that the immediate object to aim at was not to convert the converted, but to teach the converted how to convert others. My position as thus stated was ultimately approved by all; and Mr. Easley, the distinguished secretary of the Federation, took measures accordingly.
Barnum continued in this strain until he convinced the major that it would not be safe to place so gifted an animal under instructions to so capricious a critic as Easley, who would surely damage his morals, as well as his manners.
In the "Polite Speech Maker" will be found such sentences as "the tranquilized glory of our glorious country," and "the undying beauties, that starry emblem, our flag, awakens in our heart of hearts;" and sundry others, equally abstruse, but no less essential to the objects of primary meetings. The author of this invaluable work is my learned friend and very erudite scholar, Dr. Easley.
It ought also to be mentioned here that the general, out of sheer respect to his honesty as a critic, appointed Easley guardian to his gifted pig, whose earnings he promised to transmit to Polly Potter instead of the unfathomable depths of the "Bleeding Kansas Fund."
Some days later Mr. Easley and an assistant secretary came from New York to call on me and discuss the arrangements, of which I have already spoken. Meanwhile I had secured rooms in the city at the Savoy Hotel, to which in due time I migrated. The day after my arrival Mr. Easley appeared again, and with him Dr. Nicholas Murray Butler, the president of Columbia University.
We can discuss the matter over the meal. All I can say now is that if the Golden Eagle is still in shape for her old-time stunts there is work ahead of her that will prove harder than anything she has yet tackled. However, I know you are not the chaps to balk at a little danger particularly when exciting adventures are in the wind. So long, then, till to-morrow: "LATHROP EASLEY"
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